My soon to be 92 year old mother is in an excellent AL. The meals are excellent. The problem is that she refuses to eat them. She orders candy and cookies and microwave pancakes to be delivered from a local grocery store. She has congestive heart failure and is on oxygen 24/7. She is ending up in the ER almost weekly because she has trouble breathing. Each time, the physician tells us that it is because of poor nutrition. Yet, she won’t listen. She is furious with the AL nurses who try to get her to eat properly. She lashes out at me. Her physician will not activate her POA’s despite my mother wanting me to handle her finances. As a result, I can not get her credit card away from her and can not stop these grocery store deliveries. I am an attorney who is required to be in court almost daily. Judges do not simply allow us to not show up at court when the ER and hospitalization calls come. We are not allowed to have cell phones in the courtroom. If I would not show up at court without the judges permission, I would be fined or held in contempt. The client can file a malpractice claim or a complaint with the State Bar that can take away my livelihood. Yesterday, I was preparing for a trial for today when the calls came. She had to go to the ER by ambulance. We could not reach the judge to have permission for an adjournment until a few minutes before I needed to be in the car on the way to the trial. My staff is upset because this is becoming almost weekly for the same reasons. I don’t always have someone to cover for me to be available at the hospital or to talk to medical providers. I am the primary financial support for my family. I have no one else in the family to back me up. I am at my wits end! Even my dogs are messing in the house because they sense my stress. Even lawyers have aging parent issues and feel powerless. Any suggestions as to how to handle this if the primary physician won’t help? The judges have had it with me about this and it can’t exactly be easy on my mother.