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My sister is able to shower, dress herself and prepare food. She struggles with managing her finances. She lived at the WestYMCA in Manhattan. I gave her the money to pay but she didn't (even though she told me she did). You are only allowed to stay 25 days then you're required to leave for 2 before you can return. This was not communicated to us when she began living there. She refused to leave. My other sister, Laura, tried to convince her to move out but was not successful. She was screaming and yelling. Police were called and she was eventually able to calm down. She left peacefully but the Y said she was not allowed back. My sister and I checked her into a hotel and now she has to leave by June 13th. The hotel's policy is that you are only allowed to spend 20 days then you're required to leave for 1 before checking back in. She does not answer my phone calls, email or text. My brother shipped her up from Florida because he was leaving the country. She was in 3 different centers in Florida and at one point was diagnosed was dementia. She went to a neurologist but walked out before seeing the Dr. We tried again at Columbia Presbyterian but again she refused to see the neurologist. For a while she lived with my sister Laura but walked out with her suitcase one day and didn't return.

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Mer, I just want to concur with Geaton that you should not be giving your sister money or paying for her housing.

The sooner she gets into the shelter system, the sooner she will get help.

Whether she accepts that help or not is another story.

Read Liz Scheier's Never Simple for an account of a good daughter trying to get her mentally ill mom the help she needed.
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Mer, welcome!

What kind of "centers" was your sister staying in while in Florida?

What are your sister's financial resources? Does she have Medicaid set up in NYS?

I would call 311 and ask to be put in touch with the local Area Agency on Aging for the neighborhood your sister is currently lives in. NYC Department of Aging uses contract agencies in each neighborhood. They should be able to assign a social workervto assist her.

Has your sister suffered from mental issues in the past?

It may be time to let go of b trying to manage her care if she's resistant and let the state take guardianship.

This is a link to the contact for for Dept of Aging:

https://www1.nyc.gov/site/dfta/about/contact-aging-connect.page
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It's not the first or the last case of anosognosia or lack of insight. Many people with dementia, substance abuse or mental illness refuse to cooperate with treatment. Many homeless shelters are full of them. Social agencies have a hard time dealing with these people in large cities where they abound.
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Beatty Jun 2022
Profile states sister has Parkinson's Disease. This can certainly bring dementia & anosognosia would you agree?
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The most you can do is report her to APS and give them the address of the hotel where she's staying, letting them know that she may be kicked out on June 13th. But it is possible APS wont' "see" any/enough evidence that she is a "vulnerable elder" and may do nothing.

You will not be able to continue paying for a place for her to live. Eventually she won't be able to even take care of herself, not just her finances. What will you do then if you don't have PoA or legal guardianship for her? She has to volunteer to assign PoA to you/your sister. Guardianship is pursued through the courts and can be very expensive. She will need to go into a facility on Medicaid (assuming she'd qualify). The county can assume guardianship for her with the same end result. Just keep reporting her to APS when the opportunities arise.
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