How do you discuss or bring up topic of making a will or some kind of document to protect family?

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I would really like it if my mom would sign some kind of papers in the event something happens to her I can take over her financial obligations, and medical decisions. Not sure how to discuss this with her. Don't want her to feel bad or take it wrong. I just know how important it is to have things in place. I'm only 35, and have my affairs in order for my son if something was to happen to me before he is 18, and there after as well. It just makes sense. Will a document hold legal merit if I just fill out a sheet of paper, we both sign it, and just have it notarized? Sure would be a lot easier, and she'd be more likely to just do that, and not continue to put it off. I want it to place me in charge of her medical decisions as well so I can make the best choices for her, and also support her wishes. Anyone have any tips, info., or advice on this topic to share please? I'm the type of person who likes to have things in order, and in place for "just in case". However we all need it at some point. Don't get why some people won't discuss these things. Thanks a bunches!

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I keep hearing that about the state coming in but I've never seen it happen; my fil didn't have a will and it didn't happen; however when the property was divided up and we were given our deed, it was the only property basically that there was an already recorded to that had been signed by the man who'd owned it's widow whose name wasn't on the prior deed and he didn't have a will so yes, we were told that she didn't actually have legal authority to sign the deed but she said she didn't know what she was signing anyway and that their kids had actually gotten a percentage and should have had to sign the deed as well and they hadn't; turns out they had actually intended to take him to court but just hated to put their mother through the humiliation of having to say she didn't know what she was doing and now she's passed away anyway but this one daughter who took care of everything won't sign the deed; she's saying the property never was paid for anyway, so...what a mess
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Kellyb: You don't want the estate to go through probate.
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Mom needed to redo her will after Dad died. At the time we did her POAs. If there is no will, the state will come in and value the property and take a percentage when the assets are sold. Then u have to go to court to determain who is the person who should inherit. If there is a wife and children the wife only gets a percentage. The children re considered closest living relatives not the wife. A will makes everything so much simplier.
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You should locate an estate attorney. My brother is one. Where do you live?
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Kelly i wrote a series of posts at palcaregivers called the three documents every adult over 18 should have. Perhaps it would help to have mom read them. They are very easy to understand and so important. Case in point a friend of mine has a nephew young in his 30s who set up his sister as his POA just incase. Sure enough a few years ago he was in a bad motorcycle accident. He was unable to manage on his own so his sister stepped in with the legal athority he gave her years before. This saved him from his greedy parents who wanted his settlement money. He is no safe and secure because he planned ahead at a young age. People should not wait to prepare these documents. They are so important and can be changed later in life if circumstances change. Convo me if you have more questions. Ruth Anne
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I agree with Deb; thank you for providing the update and your general plans. And best wishes for you and your mother.
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Kelly, don't think I've seen anybody come on here and provide closure like that - very nice - how old are your parents?
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Thank you for all the suggestions, I do take them all very serious, and to heart. I will definitely see about getting legal paperwork by/attorney, Its best to have things like this for the good of everyone involved. So all, and all it's worth the convincing to get parent to hop on board. If I did have (living) siblings I'd definitely consult with them first, but Its only me. I'm the one who has always done it. I wouldn't change anything really, but I'd like some days to just be a little less stressful like the rest of us:) Best wishes All, Kelly
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GardenArtist, I absolutely agree about informing siblings of a will or legal issues regarding parent, However my only sibling killed himself in 2007, so I can't exactly give him a call, But thanks.
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where do I keep missing these things? where does Kelly say her mom already has Alzheimer's?
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