Hearing loss driving me crazy. Any advice?

Always consider that a hearing aid may not be right for someone if they keep "losing" it. They can aggravate the "recruitment" phenomenon, and sensitivity to loud noises can be very real. Ears are hooked up to brains, and brains can do some funny things while trying to adjust to altered sensory inputs. I get this and know I have to adjust to a little tinny sound quality because I cannot tolerate low frequencies being amplified, though my former audiologist strenuously objected; she also did not think I could use open fit with my degree of loss but was completely incorrect. (Note I said former. I will NOT put up with an audiologist who will not listen.) The first set I tried - there was no way - I would have had a migraine in another 30 seconds of use, and the guy had the nerve to say he thought I'd be more "motivated" to try to get used to them. My current audiologist also has migraines herself and understands. We all have to understand that aids can be great, but they do not quite replicate normal hearing.

And, if someone is wearing their aids and doing their best to understand you, DO repeat or communicate a different way, ideally just the words or ideas they did not get, that makes it easier on both parties. For example, my hubby hollers from the other room something that sounds like "Hey honey come get the mail, your soup pots are breaded" I would say "my SOUP POTS are BREADED?" and he should say, a little louder and clearer "your coupons are ready", not start with "hey honey come get the mail..." then fade off again. If it is worth communicating, it is worth repeating, otherwise you inadvertently convey that the hearing impaired person does not matter and does not need to know what is going on. But yes, I get that the person who refuses to use what they have if it is working correctly can't demand endless repetition and needs that kind of behavior modification.

There are aids out there suitable for severe to profound loss, and beyond that, there are cochlear implants. I was surprised to find out an older patient of mine with myotonic dystrophy was able to get one and benefit.

Ale, I love your link too!

Taking a different turn, although communicating can be difficult and frustrating there are still ways to spend some quality time with your mother doing activities that can cater to people who are hard of hearing.

Take a look at this article, it has a few useful tips about interaction with hearing impaired people as well as some ideas of some fun activities you can experience with them.

I hear the newer hearing aids are much better and are less annoying than the hearing aids even from 5 years ago. I have mild hearing loss and have difficulty when there is a lot of noise, my dad has hearing loss but won't wear his aids, says the sound isn't 'life like' and sounds like a radio and when there is a loud noise it's painful to him. My brothers mother in law just obtain new hearing aids, small and easy to use; she says they have really changed the way she hears and they are wonderful. I don't like not being able to hear things or not hearing things correctly. I would consider aids if the time comes I need them

Please know that there are devices out there to help with many situations in the home in regards to someone with hearing loss. It is my mission to spread the word as I have been working for a great company called Harris Communications for the past 2 years. We distribute products for the deaf and hard of hearing. We have everything from signaling equipment, amplified telephones, tv listening and personal amplifiers which many people use in lieu of hearing aids, etc. I would be ever so glad to help anyone in any way that I can! :) There is more out there than just hearing aids. And it is my experience that most seniors either lose them or have a hard time changing the batteries, etc.

Keep a pad and pencil nearby...I resort to writing stuff down that's important for her to understand. I'm also getting good at being a mime. Plus between my mother, MIL and husband, I usually just say everything twice. Saves the constant Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Well, at least it cuts one Huh out of the conversation. ;-\

NYDaughter, unfortunately nothing more can be done.... I know I keep trying to tell my Mom it's not the hearing aid, it HER EARS... but she refuses to believe that. She keeps thinking someone someplace has a magic hearing device. Dad wants to buy an ear trumpet :)

After a year of my FIL saying "WHAT?" we all just stopped indulging him and kept on with our conversations. It was awkward for a while and I felt very uncomfortable doing it but repeating things was irritating and driving us crazy. It worked. He has them and wears them. Now when he says "WHAT?" we tell him to check his batteries but we still don't repeat ourselves. After a certain amount of hearing loss do hearing aids even work???

My Dad has a bad habit of keeping used batteries if the battery has an ounce of power left in them [he has a voltmeter]... I am beginning to think when Mom needs a new battery in her hearing aid instead of using a brand new one, Dad will use a used battery :P

Plus the newer hearing aid Mom picked out is much smaller than her other one, but smaller also means more difficulty in handling.... but heaven forbid if anyone would notice Mom is wearing a hearing aid. I had to return this newer hearing aid back to the audiologist because it stopped working.... well, yeah, looked like Dad pry opened something he shouldn't have, probably looking for the battery compartment, a piece was missing.... [sigh]

zookeeper. I had to laugh, not that its funny, just that my mother is the same. She has lost hers at least 3 times, doesn't clean them enough so they break down (another trip for me to the aid place) She peels the tabs off them, dumps them all together and often puts the dead one back in with the rest. Today we were back to get a new set - another $3500. This time she is getting behind the ear type because her hearing is soooooooooo bad. I pray she can figure them out as she is slowly losing ability to even work the tv remote. Fortunately we just moved her to AL, so I'm going to ask the caregivers to do the same, help her put them in, change batteries and take them at night so she doesn't lose the darn things again.

Ha! My mom and her hearing loss drives EVERYONE nuts. Same problem with the excessive ear wax build-up and the latest hearing aid she has is so hard for 88 year old mom to figure out. It has 3 modes intended for different circumstances, but only one of the modes actually "works" for her. She can barely find and feel the control button, so she rarely gets to the mode that works! I finally asked the hearing aid doctor to reprogram the darn thing so only the mode that "works" is presented. But she still forgets to put it in and "loses" it all of the house -- treasure hunt for it is a routine part of the day. Her care workers now schedule cleaning of her ears, the aid, replace the batteries, the filters, etc, every Monday morning. That has helped keep the hearing aid "working". Now if we could just get her to actually use it, we'd only have to repeat ourselves 100 times...so frustrating!!!

P.S. freqflyer: um, ewww...cemented earwax? What a visual! My Dad and uncle had the same problem and they would take turns using a water-pik to clean out their ears. They would make an evening out of it.

What did you say?......:) Sorry I couldn't resist. I guess I should have introduced myself to you all that while I can be serious and spiritual & God-seeking, I do have a part of me that resembles the immature cheese on the cheese-it commercial. :) I must admit, if I can get someone to laugh, it makes my day:)

Anyway....I had a g-mom who did not like to wear hers either, then she had the "selective" turn on/turn off switch. Not much you can do, but after all is said and done, after the frustrations, there can be some fond memories and you'll find that you'll miss it :)

Love my hearing aid! Maybe if the person needing them had gotten that taken care of when younger? I do think they should be purchased thru an audiologist at an ENT. I have 2 brother-in-laws younger than I, but are so vain they would rather drive us all crazy. One even comments, "I can't even see your aids". Duh, well go get your hearing taken care of!

Raising my hand here, too. My Mom and her ever failing hearing. But she is her own worse enemy as the hearing aid places [she's been to two so far] are telling her that she needs to get the wax cleaned out of her ears..... she refuses the hot water and refuses the ear drops. Now the wax has concreted itself to the inside of her ears and only surgery would fix it, but at 97 that's not an option.

Then Mom blames the new hearing aid as the reason she can't hear.... now she wants to go to a 3rd hearing aid place. Mom can hear maybe one word out of 20, thus talking on the phone is a real challenge. Like if I say "jello" her brain translates it as "yellow" or "pillow".

Well the new hearing aids - depending on their severity of loss - are so small that you cannot see them, and the audiologist tells me that many boomer age doctors in my town get them so the patient doesn't know.
It drives me crazy too. We have went through three hearing aids in about five years and she still hates it and constantly fusses about it. Half the time the battery is out so then it is our fault because we 'mumble.' When the TV is on, she hears nothing at all. She will not stand in front of the mirror to put it on, so it is half hanging out and that ' is the fault of the company who made this rotten thing!'

I have also had strangers give me dirty looks in the store when I am talking loud or repeating things.

I'm a member of that club too. My 100 year old mother is profoundly deaf. We just ordered new hearing aids, again, as she keeps losing them. Her hearing is selective, often she doesn't really listen or says "what" and then you sigh, and she says "I heard that"! To make it worse, my spouse has needed hearing aids for the past three years and is still procrastinating. I am so sick of repeating myself, translating what the waitress says, and worst of all the loud tv. Yes, it makes you really really angry when you know there is help for it and they instead blame you for "mumbling" or talking when your back is turned, or some other excuse.

My mother says "Wha...?" to most everything I say. Usually she doesn't hear me, so I have to repeat a time or two. The worst is when she said she did hear me and tells me she didn't know why she said wha... I figure it is just to drive me a little crazier. Really, I know it's habit and the time it takes to process what I said.

Aggravating isn't it? My 96 yo mother is the same way. She is in a nursing home and she wheels way over in front of you in order to hear. AND she mishears and gets things all mixed up. I swear that i am going to start having my hearing checked regularly. People avoid her, because they can't converse with her.

Yes, yes, yes. My father refused to get one and we all catered to him. Now my mother is to the point where I have to repeat what I say (which makes me see red) at least once. there are situations where she doesn't even hear me speak and I am 2 feet away from her. My biggest fear is that something is going to happen to her and she will call out for me and I won't be able to hear her because the TV is too loud or something like that. sigh