I'm not happy with the treatment he's getting. Dad has had heart problems for sometime which are quite serious. The dementia has only come on in the past few months and very bad over the past two weeks. I know he needs geriatric medical and psychiatric evaluation. I would like to move him to UCLA, but since he's on a 72 hour hold (California law) I don't know what my rights I have to get conservatorship? I'm just feeling very lost in the system, a system I have absolutely no idea how to move forward through. My best hope would be that He could be prescribed medications that would moderate his aggression and agitation, so that he could go back to regular in home care. Short of that, I would like to get him into a really good care facility, there are memory care facilities nearby but I've been told it because of his behavior they might not consider him. I don't want him to end up heavily sedated in a crazy nursing home. I just feel completely overwhelmed.

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It is overwhelming. Do you have any reason to think that the place he is at now is not good at treating dementia symptoms. If they can prescribe medications that help the aggression wouldn't that work toward your goals? If they need more than the required 3 days and have a care plan for him, would you consider leaving him there? Would you want him transferred to UCLA at that point?

I suspect that everyone's goal at this point is to help this man be non-aggressive without sedating him excessively.

Are you his next of kin? Has he given you medical power of attorney? Does he have a health care directive?

As soon as possible make an appointment to talk to a social worker where your father is now. That person can help you sort out your options.
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