I am the POA for my Mother and have done 90% of the care for 5 years. I would like to start taking compensation, which my POA document says I can. Any advice?

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2 years ago I had to put her in a nursing home since she has Alzheimer's. I have moved her 4 times and now have her back in her home town. The cost is $5,500 per month which she can pay with her income. She also has a $200,000 investment. 2 of my sibs make my life hell. I have a long story but no need to go into. I live 5 hours from mom but visit twice a month and have an apartment there. Several weeks ago I had a mental crisis and was in the hospital 2 days. My psychiatrist told me to move to the town my mother is in and save myself. I would like to start taking compensation, which my POA document says I can. My attorney says I should tell my sibs I am doing. I don’t agree and am seeing another attorney next week. The POA says “reasonable” amount. Any advice? I have been doing it for free for 5 years and my mother will NEVER run out of money. Please help me!

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I'm with RM - too many inconsistencies, early negative response to posters, recanting....who knows what the real situation is?
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I think the $200,000 investment must be a typo as well because there is no way that little bit will keep mom set for life, even with long term care insurance.

And I still say that visiting twice a day is not something that you get paid for, strangers might get paid to do it as a job but family does it because they are family. My life would be a lot easier if I allowed myself a salary for being a loving daughter. If your siblings - no matter how deadbeat - want to kick up a fuss about it then they probably have legal grounds to do so.
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Okay. I’m calling it.

Now mom is 82 - according to the edited profile. Previously mom was 68.

When asked about 68 and the money lasting we were told a few posts back that the OP was 68 and mom 86.

Mom being 86 was better. Cause if mom is now 82 then she was a mother at age 14. Which is certainly possible- but gets less plausible with the three stated ages.

OP lives five hours away. OP has not worked in five years and “been with mom the whole time” for the past five years. OP
visits twice a month. OP just moved two weeks ago.

OP asked the same question about a week ago - got three replies but never posted again until this one.

I really am sorry if I’m wrong here - but way too many inconsistencies in this all.

What’s up, Brinaz? And please don’t do the “you’re being mean, hateful and not supportive - I thought I would get support but...” thing as that’s a red flag to a bogus post. Tell us the truth if you really do have a situation needing help.
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Profile says mom is 82. How many years will mom's long term care pay her costs? There usually is a limit of a number of years.

I was 24/7 caregiver for my mom with Alzheimer's for four years. Twisted sister 2 was POA. In the beginning of the care I was told by ts2 that she wanted to pay me and I agreed I would wait a few months to see what happened with mom. Well, a year later ts2 finally decided to consult mom's attorney on drafting a care agreement. She did not like what mom's attorney told her as far as what reasonable cost would be and what mom would want. She fired that attorney and found one that told her what she wanted to hear. That led to nearly three years of legal wrangling and an award from the court that I be paid for two years of the care I had already provided and going forward. The amount of money that ts2 spent of mom's to fight paying me was absurd, especially considering that she did this to protect her inheritance.

After four years I decided I had enough harassment by twisted sisters and they placed mom in memory care. Much of that time mom also needed 24 hour supervision because of her behaviors. That monthly bill was about $12,000.00, including the 6K that was paid to the facility.

If the POA states you can be paid. Do it with a care agreement. But, you cannot negotiate with yourself. You will need to get a geriatric care manager to assess mom's needs and how much time that will require from you. Then have attorney draw up the agreement reflecting exactly what your duties are and how much you will be paid.
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Brinaz, many people who aren't getting the support they deserve from family do develop "thin skins." I think most of us can understand this.

But also consider that most people on this forum are actively doing caregiving, sometimes 24/7 in their homes. They are under a lot of pressure and tension, and sometimes can get a little snarky in their responses.

Let's all just cut each other some slack. OK?
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Could you clarify what kind of place your mother is in? You said "nursing home," but $5,500 per month seems very low for NH in many locations. So something thought it must be the less expensive option of assisted living. And from descriptions of your mother's behavior I wondered if it was memory care. Not this makes much difference to how much to charge and should you tell your siglings, but it is good to have a full picture if you intend to come back, and I hope you do.

The small town my aunts lived in had a Care Center that covered a large range of needs. One of my aunts there would probably have qualified for memory care, but there isn't MC anywhere close to the town where her friends can visit her. My other aunt would have been fine on Assisted Living, at least at first, but she too wanted to be where the entire community knew her. I don't know whether the center charged different rates for different levels of care, but it was evident they provided several different levels of care. So I guess we shouldn't jump to conclusions based on the rate a facility charges.
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A big sorry; I was having a pity party
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Thanks Jeannegibs. I just moved closer to mom 2 weeks ago to stay full time. I have had the apartment 2 years and allow my sibs to use when they visit. The low cost is due to the grace of an old friend.
I think I got off on the wrong foot with lots of folks. I am just so used to being mistreated by my sibs that I am over sensitive to criticism. I appreciate all the answers and will try and not be so “thin skinned”
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I found this on the internet : "According to a Genworth Financial Cost of Care Survey, the national average for licensed companion care services is $18 an hour and most services require a 4 hour minimum." The article that quotes this survey is on the seniorliving.org website. Go there and search for companion.

Companions are not medically certified. They don't get the same pay as an LPN, for example, but they should get more than a kid flipping burgers!

Would Mother's insurance cover a companion? Could she afford it out of her income?
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As you are looking for another attorney to tell you what you want to hear so are you in posting the same question here for a second time.

“I do not like some of the answers given”? Seriously?

As for walking in your shoes - you have no idea how foolish that statement is. Browse around the threads a bit. There are folks here with way bigger problems that trying to figure out how much to pay themselves from their loved ones endless supply of money.
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