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Smorrison Asked August 13, 2025

How should I handle my mom's late night rage toward my dad? They both have dementia and live in assisted living

Both my parents live in assisted living, my step mom has dementia too, she gets in rages late evening and believes things that are not true, My dad who has dementia too tries to calm her down by holding her, then she swings at him.

Llamalover47 Aug 20, 2025
Smorrison: They may now require memory care.

AlvaDeer Aug 14, 2025
Discuss with admins at their facility.
Mom may now need memory care; she sounds too far advanced in Dementia to be able to stay in ALF, and sounds a danger at this point to your Dad, possibly to others.

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LoopyLoo Aug 13, 2025
She needs meds. Not to sedate but to take the edge off the anger.

BarbBrooklyn Aug 13, 2025
This is called "sundowning". There are meds that can help. Consult her medical team.

Daughterof1930 Aug 13, 2025
I hope you’ve informed her doctor of this behavior. It sounds like she needs medication to help calm her. It is likely as frightening to her to feel so out of control as it is for others to witness. It may also be a sign that a higher level of care may be needed now. Your father needs to be protected from abuse no matter what is causing it.

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