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dadsdaughter2 Asked June 2020

How do I know when it is time to seriously start thinking of assisted living or nursing homes for my Dad? He doesn't want to.

My Dad lives in the home we grew up in. He is 92 with stage 4 kidney disease. So far he is mentally sharp and takes his own medicines 4 times a day as well as preparing his own meals except for dinner, which my sisters and I prepare for his freezer so he can microwave.
We clean his house a minimum of once a week.
I set up his pills on a monthly basis and have a daily check list for him for when he takes them. It works amazingly well.
He refuses anyone to help him bathe...very modest. But is getting less and less frequent as it wears him out.

sjplegacy Jun 2020
Several issues can help determine his best environment. I think the main considerations are his safety and your limits in caring for him. Your current arrangement seems to be working quite well. However, with his kidney issues and his need for a walker, a care facility may be the best option. His meds will be managed for him, his meals will be provided, and he'll have 24/7 nurses available. In an ALF he'll have his own private room with bath.

The concern at his age, and using a walker, would be if he fell at home, or more importantly, if he fell and injured himself. If that happened, that certainly would cause me to look for a new home for him.

Geaton777 Jun 2020
An option is in-home help from an agency (male). Will provide CG relief and give him some company. Ultimately I think the decision is the caregiver's at this point.

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MargaretMcKen Jun 2020
Could you give more detail about exactly how your Dad washes? People may be able to suggest modifications that will make it less tiring for him. Some are expensive and disruptive, but others can make a difference easily.

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