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Hylo33 Asked April 2020

How do I get my father a free social worker?

My father has cancer and heart disease. As sh*tty as that is, he also has some psychological issues in addition to being more confrontational and uncooperative than Archie Bunker. Needless to say he is uncooperative towards everything. We need some sort of free social worker program as we can't afford to pay for one. We have contacted the county social services department numerous times pleading for help and they have been beyond negligent and unhelpful, basically told us they can't help and blamed it on state law for their reasoning not to help. Suggested we call looney bin to evaluate him but all we really need is a social worker to come in and document and provide guidance instead of subjecting all of us to that trauma.


Any insight on programs providing free in-home social worker services? With the county social services agency continual refusal to help us, it really took a toll on our will to obtain help. Thx for reading.

BarbBrooklyn Apr 2020
Hylo, it would be really helpful if you told us what you need.

Do you need documentation that your father is uncooperative with your attempts at care so no one will say your didnt try to get him help?

Do you need a "needs assessment" so that you know what level of care he needs?

Do you need to know what resources are available to him?

Do you need for someone else to take over his care?

We are happy to help.

Countrymouse Apr 2020
Hylo, I'm sorry to be asking again, but what is it that your father needs that he is not getting?

You say "provide any resources that they could" about social services, but - like what?

You want social services to come to your home and do an assessment of... what? Your father's living situation? Is he at risk of anything?

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BarbBrooklyn Apr 2020
Have you called the local Area Agency on Aging? "Social Services" is a very vague term; I'm not clear on exactly what office you night have called.

This is an anonymous forum. No one is going to recognize your details. You'll get better advice if you are more specific.

surprise Apr 2020
I'm suspicious that your father is uncooperative as in, won't get treatment or take his meds. If that's the case, I'd let him do what he wants and treat him like an adult. Many people facing his battle are simply ready to be done with it and don't want to suffer through taking the pills, chemo, etc, and us kids are not ready to let them go. However, it's a personal choice. The good side of this is that once your dad has lost enough blood because of his cancer, he will be sleepy and not competent. If you need to get him hospice care at that point, he will be much more cooperative since he won't really know what is going on. If it were me, I'd prefer for my heart to give out before I had to deal with the cancer pain.
Hylo33 Apr 2020
Are you a detective which makes you suspicious? It is what it is. I did not ask for what you would prefer for yourself, but just resources, that is all I asked for.
Bridger26164 Apr 2020
Talk to his physician and get a referral for a mental health evaluation. It would be covered by Medicare. A free in home social worker is a big ask and highly unlikely to obtain. Most agencies don’t have the funding and most social workers and psychologists have their own bills to pay and don’t work for free. The best hope you have for free services is to take him the ER of a state mental health hospital. They may be able to admit him and get emergency Medicaid coverage to cover the the costs.
Hylo33 Apr 2020
Thanks for your insight, it does help. I hear you that social workers have to pay bills, rspecially those in private practise. I get that, but my dissatisfaction was with the county social workers who just dont want to be bothered. I understand you don't know all the specifics, but thanks for your productive reply.
Shane1124 Apr 2020
What exactly are you expecting from a social worker? To make your father cooperate? No one can make that happen except him.

Sounds like you’ve gone to your local department of aging and they determined they can’t help him. Is this because any program they offer requires participation on his part and he refuses?

Is he Medicaid? He may have a case worker you can call for a resource.

Do you mean a social worker as in therapist (LC-SW) for counseling for his psychological issues?
If he is insured search for a SW in your area then call his insurance company’s Customer Service rep to find out if that visit will be covered. Then you can take him to the visit.
Hylo33 Apr 2020
We expected much much more from county social services who are filled with social workers and pretty much had the same disposition as your comment "what do you want a social worker to do if he won't coopetate", well first of all, nobody who is reaching out, needs to hear such an unempathetic response from a social services agency. Secondly, it would have been at least helpful if the social services social workers would at least have documented our many emails, etc to them. They confirmed to us that they did not document any of our attempts to reach out for help, and that is just acceptable. You can defend them any way you want, but that is negligent. Lastly, sure if my father is uncooperative, at least come to the house once to document such, instead of straight out refusing, which is exactly what we were told. A social worker for a state agency does have some redponsibility and shpuld advocate for those seeking help instead of constantly sweeping work under the rug at least in our situation. And this I in no way mean to imply ALL are like this. I certainly cannot speak for the good agencies and social workers out there which we just have not come across yet.
gladimhere Apr 2020
Try calling the Area Agency on Aging. Things are very different with how government agencies are having to conduct business. They have to follow the law, too. Being patient may very well be the only option.
Hylo33 Apr 2020
Thanks so much! You provided me with a resource which is all I was asking for. Thanks again.
Countrymouse Apr 2020
What do you want this person to do, exactly?

What are your father's needs that aren't currently being met? - whether because he doesn't have access to services or is rejecting support.
Hylo33 Apr 2020
All we wanted was to come to our home, document the circumstances. and provide any resources they could. That is all we wanted, but they so were not willing to do anything. And this occured over numerous documented requests on our end. We deserved better and they should have been more empathetic to us seeking help and guidance. Believe me, as much as they didn't want to be bothered to do their job, we certainly did not want to have to demoralize ourselves by resorting to reaching out to social services. We certainly did want to have to ask for help, but they truly do not care.

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