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MYPETUNIA615 Asked December 2017

What is this obsession that my 94 yo mother has that she has to go to the bathroom every two minutes?

I am at my wit's end. She goes to the bathroom every two minutes. She does this all day and all night. I am so sleep deprived. I tell her that she just went (she doesn't believe me) and she says she has to go again and then does nothing. Any advice?????? Help Please!!!!!!!!!

blannie Jan 2018
Could she have an overactive bladder? I'd see if a consult with a urologist might be helpful. I also get it could just be an obsession...I feel for you, as it sounds like it's wearing you out. I hope you can get a handle on it one way or the other.

Hugemom Jan 2018
My petunia, my mom couldn’t the stand the little lights either! We had to put tape over every one!

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Sunnygirl1 Jan 2018
If it's not a physical problem and is an obsession with her, I'd get a psychiatric referral and ask about medication. This must be not only draining for you, but, her as well. It could be a phase, but, there's no telling how long it could last.

talkey Jan 2018
Dad went thru this too, but once we told him he'd just gone, he was ok. Maybe a little fib -- like the doctor wants you to wait a spec time between bathroom visits? It often helped to get Dad on board with something if he thought it came from the doctor.

MYPETUNIA615 Jan 2018
Thank you all for your advice.. She was just tested for a UTI and nothing was found. Her Diabetes is under control. She has been taking the same medication for years. I still think it's an obsession or an anxiety thing. She also can't stand any little light. The light on the dishwasher, the light on the cable box, etc. Refuses to wear Depends, she is still continent. Drives me crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hugemom Jan 2018
I agree that a doctor visit is in order. But, my mom had a roommate who spent the entire day and night getting out of bed, going into the bathroom, spending 10 seconds there then getting back in bed for 10 seconds, then getting back out. During the day, she wandered up and down the hall asking everyone where her room was.

The only problem was, my mom had herself convinced she had serious bowel issues, and sometimes she did. When this woman was in their bathroom, mom freaked out and sometimes would have an accident. I felt sorry for the aides. Your mom may be afraid she will have an accident as well.

Sunnygirl1 Jan 2018
I'd get her a medical evaluation to rule out any medical cause like UTI, bladder problem, medication problem, etc. I've only had 2 UTI's in my life and both times, I felt like I had to go, but, couldn't. If it's not a physical reason, then, I'd explore what else could be the cause. Does she have cognitive decline or dementia? If so, people who suffer with this, often get obsessions and it's difficult to get them to let go of certain things. I'd ask for a referral for a geriatric psychiatrist and explore treatments. Sometimes, medications help, if that is what it is.  In the meantime, I'd get some backup help. You can't go on without proper rest.  It's not healthy for either of you. 

freqflyer Jan 2018
MYPETUNIA615, I have that issue every now and then for myself. The body will tell the brain you need to use the bathroom and you sit and wait and wait. Maybe a drop or two, or nothing. For me that would happen just for a couple of days.

I found using AZO tablets did help. AZO makes tablets for all sorts of urinary issues. It can be found over-the-counter. Check with Mom's doctor to see if this is ok to use.

Mom might also have an urinary tract infection. The doctor can test for that.

Eyerishlass Jan 2018
Dear Mypetunia,

I don't have any words of wisdom but I can tell you that you are not the only one who has dealt with this issue. It's fairly common. It could be caused by medication or maybe your mom has a bladder infection. How long has this been going on?

Elderly people are obsessed with their bodily functions. I could tell you story after story from when I worked in health care. And your use of the word "obsessed" is not an exaggeration.

Does your mom have a commode in her room? That might be easier on both of you if she gets up in the middle of the night to use the commode instead of going into the bathroom. Put a night light in her room with a commode and maybe you'll get back to bed sooner. Wash the commode out in the morning.

You must be exhausted!

Does your mom wear Depends at night? Getting up and down all night must be tiring for your mom as well. Does she have medication that will help her sleep through the night?

cdnreader Jan 2018
Dear Mypetunia,

I wonder if your mom might have untreated diabetes this can cause the need for frequent bathroom trips.

My father also suffered from this towards the end of his life. He kept asking to go to the bathroom but then nothing. He had heart failure and was on water pills. He passed a month after this started.

I would try to talk to her doctor and see if they can take a closer look at her meds.

I'm so sorry, I know this is tough. It is hard to be patient when dealing with this every day.
Thinking of you and hope others will add more insight.

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