My mom and I are having an issue with her need to go to the bathroom. They tell her she has to wait. How do I handle this?

If she is at home, the aide is paid to attend to her needs and there is no excuse for asking her to wait, I would look into replacing this person with someone else.

If she is in a facility there are many who need attention and too few to help, so unfortunately sometimes people do have to wait. And as mentioned by Countrymouse, sometimes people become a little bit obsessed with their bowels and are asking to go to the bathroom repeatedly, sometimes only a few minutes after being taken... as heartbreaking as it is to hear their pleas for assistance you can't really blame the aides for tuning them out. If she is having problems with constipation it needs to be addressed by the RN on duty or her physician.

Montana, all of us will experience the continue need to need to use the restroom. It's just our bodies telling us, hey its time to go, then nothing happens :( The body is sending mix signals and there is really nothing we can do on our own.

What does your Mom's primary doctor recommend?

Sorry not physical, she is given laxative.

With the exception of the sort of repetitive obsessions that people with advanced dementia can have, believing they need to go to the bathroom every two minutes whether or not they actually do...

(Your mother only has mobility problems? Not dementia-related ones?)

... it is otherwise unforgivable for the aide to be refusing assistance to a person who needs to go.

Can you assist her yourself? - then go in search of an incredibly good explanation of the aide's attitude from the facility's manager.

Your profile says your mom is living at home, is she now in a facility Montana?

Sorry not physical, she is given laxative.