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rashon53 Asked October 2016

Who can I turn to for help in having a housemate move into a home? We are located in CT.

She does not care for herself,as bathing or taking care of her room. She smells bad as does her room with all the junk on floor. I have cleaned it 3 times when she was hospitalized but refuse to do so now. She admits its part of being lazy but she has health issues too. I do not know how to get her to move out as I cannot care for her and my sickly mother. She needs help but refuses to see that.

pamstegma Oct 2016
rashon53, see a lawyer, you will have to go through formal eviction process. You need to know whose name is on the lease. If it is her name, then I would suggest you and mom be the ones moving.

cwillie Oct 2016
Rashon, just tell her it just isn't working any more and that you need her to find another place to live, you aren't obligated to explain or justify yourself. Set a date so she understands you are serious and not just grumbling. If she doesn't respond to that then you will have to serve her with a formal eviction notice.

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rashon53 Oct 2016
She is helping to pay rent but I just cannot have her here anymore. She has lived with us for 6 years and as of 4 years ago has helped out. She fell and broke her shoulder 4 years ago and has been in hospital 2 times. Since being in hospital she has gotten lazier and stopped helping me with Mom or household. She is on oxygen 24/7, but not really and she smokes. Very short of breath. With her way of living its effecting me and mom way to much to have her stay with us.

GardenArtist Oct 2016
Is this your mother or the housemate? If the latter, I definitely would not be cleaning up after her - that's totally beyond expectations.

What's the basis for her living with your mother? Was she supposed to be helping her, or is it just to share costs?

If your mother doesn't need the money, I think you need to have a nice, nonthreatening sit-down discussion with her and explain that she needs more help than can be obtained in her current living situation, and that you have to put your mother as priority.

Set an established reasonable time by which she needs to find other living arrangements. You could even volunteer (if you think it would help) to get lists of places she can go to, as I suspect from what you write that she isn't going to make much effort.

There's a safety issue as well; her lack of care could affect your mother if her hygiene and mess create fall and health hazards.

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