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Carmensdaughter Asked September 2016

I am going to be bringing my mother home from assisted living because I cannot afford it any longer.

I will not be able to work any longer.

freqflyer Sep 2016
Here are some things to think about if you are trying to decide whether to quit work to care for your mother.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which includes not only loss of salarys... it also includes the net worth loss of the health insurance coverage.... loss of money being put into Social Security/Medicare..... loss of other benefits such as matching 401(k).... profit sharing.... workman's comp insurance.... company sponsored life insurance.... vacation pay, sick pay.... tuition assistance, etc. [source: in part Reuters 5/30/12]

Sign your Mom up for Medicaid. At least with Medicaid they will help pay for continuing care but it won't be at an Assisted Living facility, more likely a nursing home.

Depending on your own age, if you are close to retirement and are already on Medicare for your own health insurance, and am receiving Social Security, you might be able to bring Mom home, but would you have the energy to do everything that she would need? Your profile says your Mom has Alzheimer's/Dementia which could mean you are dealing with 168 hours a work each week... hopefully there are other siblings or relatives that can help you out. Otherwise you will crash and burn pretty quickly. Then what? Mom goes into a nursing home.

Here's an idea, some Assisted Living facility have room-mate type rooms, each person has their own bedroom, but they share a bath. This is less expensive.

Countrymouse Sep 2016
CD, you say in your profile that your mother had 'some kind days, but mostly quite vicious' towards you. Then you debate the care options you've seen so far; and then you say that you are looking forward to caring for your mother at home, even though you are well aware that it is going to be tough.

What is it that you are looking forward to? Her deteriorating mental status? Her continued wandering? Her better days getting fewer and further between, while you get shorter and shorter of sleep?

Please keep researching, please find better options; please, at least ask the facility if they are able to suggest any assistance. You will be broke, you will be stuck and your mother will only get worse. Please don't give up your job/ability to support yourself. Please don't bring her home to live with you.

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JessieBelle Sep 2016
If you and she can't afford AL, how could you afford to quit work?

pamstegma Sep 2016
Don't do it. Get her on a Medicaid Waiver program instead.

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