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Bunnybelle Asked January 2016

My family and Dad live together but lately I feel guilty because he's driving me nuts. Any advice?

He never stops talking and won't pay attention if I speak. We are all close and love each other very much. I don't want him to be upset so I rarely ever say anything regarding this new behavior, but it also makes me feel like hiding out so I don't have to deal with the problem. I feel loaded with guilt and stress.

Bunnybelle Feb 2016
Thanks Veronica69, this does help and I really appreciate your input.

Veronica69 Feb 2016
Hi - I know your dilemma very well indeed - my father is exactly the same - although he lives across from us - we don't share a house. He too talks enormously - you cannot get a word in. But like you we too love him and feel the whole guilt for been annoyed at him. I suggest you and your husband go out regularly for some you time. Sometimes take your son for his time out too. I find you come back refreshed and more able to cope. What helps us is when he visits mum at the aged care centre - as he talks heaps to everyone , staff, residents, visitors and that helps him too. Is there an activity/ group he could join to give him more people to talk to?hope this helps , I'm new to this forum thing too!!!

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Bunnybelle Jan 2016
Thanks everyone for all of your great suggestions. To answer some of your questions, he's always been the type of guy who gets lost in his own thoughts. He was more on the less talkative side, but would genuinely engage with you, he was and still is an extremely caring person. My husband, son and I not only love him but,up until recently, really enjoyed his company. We lost my Mom a little over a year ago so there have been a lot of changes for my Dad. Sometimes I wonder if the constant talking helps him fill the space of missing my Mom so terribly much. I'd love for him to get checked out by a doctor or psychologist but that's just not something he's going to do. I really want to be there for him, like he has always been for me, I just don't know how to do that without a big knot in my stomach. This is the first time I've ever joined one of these sites and it feels so good to have you all to talk with. Thanks again!

notrydoyoda Jan 2016
Sounds like your dad needs a total evaluation of his own health. What are his problems currently? How do others in your family respond to him and feel about him being there living with ya'll?

Is he in your house or are ya'll in his house?

freqflyer Jan 2016
When you wrote "He never stops talking and won't pay attention if I speak" I was thinking about my boss. Some people are just like that, what they have to say is just much more important than what you have to say.... [sigh].

Bunnybelle Jan 2016
Thanks pamstegma, that's good advice. I am actually working with my gp on the anxiety issue, but feel I also need to learn to cope with my situation better. I so appreciate your thoughts.

pamstegma Jan 2016
Get a complete physical ASAP and tell the MD about your anxiety.

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