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janicemartin Asked February 2015

I'm taking care of my Mom. What are my rights as her daughter to make decisions for her?

Mom's had Alzheimer's since 2013. She lives with me and my husband and is still married to my stepfather who has since stop giving any financial help since November 2014. I've taken care of her finances and medical issues for the last two years. What are my rights as her daughter to make decisions about their house, furniture and at this point I make all of her decisions I have a poa before she got sick but I'm thinking I need something else since my stepfather is not helping and might try to sell the house or anything. At a loss right now

pamstegma Feb 2015
OK so he can't sell the home or get a reverse mortgage on it without her (your POA) signature on it. As for the VA, Beneficiaries in receipt of Pension Benefits 1-877-294-6380.

janicemartin Feb 2015
thank you for all the comments, she is joint owner of the home and before she had become ill, she separated her social security and retirement check in an account only with her and my name on it so that is taken care of. He just refuses to give half of his veteran disability which I applied and got for him. He is suppose to give half as she is his dependent per military regulations. anyway I will deal with that through VA. He is 85 and having some dementia to I belive unapproachable at this point he has children who are worthless.

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pamstegma Feb 2015
Mom is getting social security, right? Or are her checks going into a joint account with the stepfather? You may need an attorney to legalize their separation and establish support payments. The other possibility is that he is not well either and is forgetting to manage the financials. I hope he is approachable so you can work this out.

surprise Feb 2015
First off, is the house in her name or held jointly? He can't sell the house without her (or POA's) signature if it's jointly owned. If it's listed only in hers, fine; only in his, it's not hers to sell.

How do you find out? Go to the tax website of the county and see who is billed by searching by address. Then you can usually find a record number there, or maybe on the "GIS" page. Hike over to the register of deeds webpage, and use the information gathered from the earlier steps to find the actual deed. I found out all of this when looking for what my mthr owned -she'd bought land I did not know about!

pamzimmrrt Feb 2015
Why has SF quit helping out his wife with your bills, etc? You may need to talk to an attorney... or at least ask SF what;s up? He may be willing to work with you on the house issue.

notrydoyoda Feb 2015
Is the house in both of their names? If it is, then I don't think he could sell it without your signing in her behalf.

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