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sweetmary52 Asked May 2014

Home being deeded to my son upon my death which will avoid probate court. Any advice?

I put my son in my will to be put on the deed of my home , which is paid for, upon my death, which will avoid probate court.I worked for many years, and I have also used food stamps, medical benefits, ssi for some from trauma from an ex husbands family being so cunning ,

I have read that my son will not be billed for my use of the medical, food, and ssi. I will be on social security this year, and can work some, and hope to. I told my lawyer and he knows the law well,. I want to be sure, as the home was left to me by my Dad. Thanks It will be one less worry. With the time off, I overthought, and mostly now I dont, but I want to know the will is fine for him . He lives here, and has made my life easier by all he does to belp. If you know, please send back information. Thanks, again

sweetmary52 May 2014
Thanks so much, your help is so awesome. I will check into all the pros and cons. Please keep in touch, and I will pay foward in whatever way I can to help others, how you have belped me, with this information. I love this website. I am using my kindle, hoping I can access this when I need it, havent looked if it can be printed, yet. Sorry for the long story, about detail, all true, guess, I am so determined to make it known at times, maybe to me, not sure, that it was such a betrayl, and never thought I would have had something to encounter like that, but it is the past, and now is now, and I do have a counselor, anyway, thank you, again, Mary in OH

vegaslady May 2014
There are lots of reasons for burnout, as the caregivers here can testify. Among the reasons are a lack of success in facilitating change in the client, client relapse, compassion fatigue, disgust at the consequences of clients issues (drug addicts, for example may abuse and neglect their children, prostitute themselves, commit criminal acts while under the influence or to obtain money to feed the dragon), and on it goes. Some jobs require long hours, weekend shifts and on it goes. And you just can't make it better for everyone, no matter how great your intentions and skills. Talk to several people in the field before you decide to do it.

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sweetmary52 May 2014
Thank you, so much, ,I have a hairdresser license, but I about burned out doing it, at 45, seems my sensitive nature is some of the reason, as well as all the ones you stated. Yes, my social security alone is not as much as if I worked solidly before. I was home with my kids doing mary kay, and the hairstyling was lots of hours making no money, thinking that was the way they get started, and I was pretty much there as backup for the owners for walk ins, even theirs. But with my clientel growing, was when my marriage was the worst, and I pretty much would not have made it, bp so high. Wrong diagnoses, inlaws non communicators, mess. Thanks for the information about the salvation army, I will read it, and the rate of problems with burn out in the counselor position,assistant. You are so much help. My Dad was an officer in the Army, WWII, I was just thinking about how he was so disciplined, but this thing isn't being lazy or eben close, and Post traumatic stress is a great deal of it, off and on poor self confidence, I thought jumping in to help my fellow man with the counselling thing would make up for lost time, since my time off, but seeing how the will thing can still stymie a person, maybe I need to rethink, but mostly, just think logically, and know I have always done my best at the time, and forgave the ones that blind sided me at my lowest, endurance point. Thans so much. I appreciate all you have written to me, and if you have time, any more help is so appreciated. Do you know why the burn out rate is so high?, withthe counselor assistants? Just curious, for some reason, being a caregiver, type is not always as stressful, for me, but it could be, and no I habent been in the work force for a while. MaryinOH

vegaslady May 2014
Another thought...have you looked into exactly how much you will receive from Social Security at age 62? It may not be a loveable amount. You should also check again in receiving benefits on your previous husband's account. I believe you get the higher of the amount based on your earnings or your percentage of his earnings, not a combination of both.

vegaslady May 2014
Ok, let's focus and not jump around too much with the ADD thing getting going. If you get a job why would you not go for one that would actually support you rather than stick with a little SSI? I know that jumping back into the work world is scary and you probably lose the Medicaid. That is not good unless the job has benefits like health and life insurance. However, are you actually ready to go back to work? You probably haven't actually worked too much in the past if you are getting SSI instead of SSDisability. Too busy with the kids and all the other issues along the way. Instead of trying to go back to work how about contacting an organization like Goodwill? The reason they collect all those donations and sell them is to raise money for their work programs. They train people and get them into the workforce. Also, reconsider going into a helping profession like dealing with addictions. There is a huge burnout factor in the helping jobs. Try something that is not as emotionally draining.

sweetmary52 May 2014
Oh, I exercize now, am stronger, older and wiser, but was stuck this cold winter, frying to get this right, and dug a rut, thank you, please keep in touch, I will pay it forward, always have, but I got so that I needed my energy for me and my kids, and thatis about it, lost frack of a few friends, but them, me too. Bless.mary

sweetmary52 May 2014
Thank you so much. I am a visual learner, this helps, I just hope I can save it, lol, it is on my kindle. My shrink that finally diagnosed me with ocd, add, correctly two years ago, says I am ok to work, I will read what you said about how much to work. I just ate about half a pound of chocolate with sea salt, lol, and told myself it is time to go back to the counselor, and stop isolating and staying in my head. You are a doll. I appdeciate your help so much. I have a so called friend that said when her brother died , they billed her sixty thousand after her died to pay back some of his expenses, but I dont doubt that he had a lot of assets, some friends that he maybe screwed over, and I dont even know any of the details. Maybe her accounts with him were too large, who knows, and I dont cade, but I needed the ssi, because at the time I was misdiagnosed with major depression, and never was depressed, just speculated why my evil inlaws tried to take my shine away, and see me unhappy and less than them because I refused to sell my home and move my two prior kids in with them, and when I refused, they wanted me to put my noncommunicating husband on my deed, and I did ask my lawyer, and he said no. He said my Dad had asked if he should leave it to us both and the lawyer said no, just me, his daughter. I will read the last part of what you said about working, I called where I can become a drug counselor assistant, from a class online, and make a difference, with a 40 hr course, but will I lose my medical, because I will still be on ssi for a small portion of my monthly pay? I need the ins, and rx, and maybe I will only get part time. SSI, SS guy, said worst could happen, would be, I would lose ssi, little part, they could threaten to take away benefits, I could contest, and they probably would let it go, because it takes a while, and at 65, I can collect my ex's ss, and mine, I think, but I thought he said something about me being on medicaid, I wanted to take notes, but he said I was making something hard out of something easy, do you know what he was talking of? I also used food stamps and a medical card for a bit after my first divorce when I had two babies, thank you for listening. They said I was depressed all that time and they were wrong. I was obsessed, blaming myself for everything whether my fault or not, and my blood pressure was over the top, went to hair school, worked twelve or more hr days, panic attacks, came home, no money, long hours, sneaky husband, panic attacks, wrong meds, blaming me for everything, asked him to leave , he wouldn't , and when he finally did, his mom and he acted like I was the screw up, and my Dad paid our rent , he did nt have job , til after my dad died, and then his mom started, when I did not do what she wanted, she tried to break me down when I got him out, and I froze, got fat and spun thought. Why the figuring out comes later not sure, but you are a huge belp. An angel. Thank you. Tell me anymore you have time to about the work thing. I have always referred people to help, jobs, but when I dropped him, they tried to act like their son was so much better, and I have no idea why they were so deviceive. The other day, I realized if it took at least eight of them to make up one brain to try, to stop me, I must have been a threat. I know I am on my way, now, and you are all hlping. Excuse typos, Mary in OH.

vegaslady May 2014
Your son will never be made to pay back your Food Stamps. Zero chance. I've worked in welfare in the last few years, as well 45 years ago. I know this. Next, SSI, I have never, ever heard of a third party (your son) having to pay back any other person's SSI. If you are worried about that call Social Security 1-800-772-1213, or go on ssa.gov and look for yourself. Now Medicaid is iffy. Have you been in a long term care facility, a nursing home? If not don't worry about it. You or your son will not have to pay anything back. Now, for the long view. Someday, way down the road, you may again need Medicaid for nursing home care. If you die, then the above post about the state having a claim on the house with a higher priority than your son is correct and he would not likely get the house. So now you can obsess about that possibility down the road. Now there might be a reason to set up a trust early on, put the property in the name of the trust, and name your son as a successor trustee (after you) and successor beneficiary. Here's where you need a lawyer. Talk to the lawyer now and be sure you understand the answers.
And good for you for being recovered enough to look for work again. Get a job with an outfit that offers group life insurance with the option to voluntarily sign up for more than the minimum they offer. Insure yourself big time and name your son or trust as beneficiary. Maybe he can use that to help get his own house!

sweetmary52 May 2014
Thanks, you both are a breath of fresh air to this ocd, add overthinker. So OH allows the house transfer on death deed to my house to my son? Is there any way , that he will be billed for my food stamps, medical, or ssi use or should I take my document to an elder law attorney, for second opinion? See what three obsessing for a couple three months can do? I think it is time to stop, and get about job hunting, but you are so appreciated. I will send wording when I get the document, or maybe if you could just anzwer what you think about what I asked, ran out of my focus med til coming wk, can u tell, lol. Thanks. Mary in OH. I told the dog today that I should have been Einstein, I am smart, it is just, I can reitterate a topic for notstop, seems I can with some, but other topics, I punish me, enough. God bless. Mary in OH

vegaslady May 2014
Debralee is correct, but I checked and Ohio does.

Labs4me May 2014
Not all states allow a transfer on death deed or automobile titles. You should definately seek legal advice from a reputable attorney who specializes in estate and elder affairs.

sweetmary52 May 2014
Thank you so much. Any help you have is so much appreciated. I am going to be 62 , early retirement. I think maybe, in order not to stay on spin cycle thought review all summer, mabe I should pick up my deed and will, and seek a second opinion from an elder attorney. What does that sound like? I appreciate your input so much. When I overthink, sometimes I isolate, if that makes sense, and I look and act young sometimes, mostly, always gor my age, but I could think I was way old, if I dwell on law all summer. I hope we can keep in touch, you have no idea how much you are belping, and I will pay it forward. Keep in touch, you are an angel(:

vegaslady May 2014
As to working while on Social Security....are you retiring at your full retirement age or earlier, say at age 62? If you are taking early benefits yes, you can work, but if you do work and earn over a certain amount per year (which changes each January) you may have to pay back a portion of the benefits you received for that year. Say you earn over the exempt amount, then you have to repay a portion of the SS back. SS will notify you of how much. If it's a hardship to repay it as a lump sum deducted from your benefits, ask for a payment agreement and pay it back over several years, little at a time deducted from your benefits. I speak here from experience, having earned over the limits for several years after my retirement at 62. Don't hold back on earning, just make sure you estimate your income tax for the year and have enough withholding to cover that. Glad to know there is a fellow overthinker out there. I think it's a good obsession to have. I don't have any idea if NV is similar to OH in the deeds on death, but ask the lawyer. If you might have a headache when getting this explained, either bring your son or ask to tape record the meeting so you can review it later. This recording also works during doctor visits if you think you think you might not remember everything you hear.

sweetmary52 May 2014
I couldnt read replies as I wrote, because I am using my kindle now, but I know I can catastrophize, and this all proves, one can revert during stress. Do you have any more seminar help, I will share as soon as I can not freak myself out. It will be slightly funny, I guess, but not now. Thanks so much M in OH

sweetmary52 May 2014
I thank yoou all for your help. I am on overthinker, and with the traumatic event from my second inlaw, which is forgiven, I had to use ssi, and food stamps, now am ready, to retire, on social security in june. The social security man said I could work on social security some, but now I am worried about this document. The person who answered about NV was so helpful, but I live in OH. I thank you so much all of you. I am a good, kind outgoing gal, that was blindsided, by what I call cowardly actions. I have forgiven, but if you have any more help , I do need honest reassurance. I think the lawyer did not mean to make me doubt. I had such a headache, and I dont understand legal terms. I havent picked up the document. I have hiatal hernia trouble that gets unmanagable upon extreme stress, and have been a slug today. I am physically strong, but this wipes me out. I have much to do. Do you know, please, if OH is the same as NV, any natural remedies for gerd? Thank you, so much.. I know it will all work out. It is simply that I worry so, and freeze, and overthink. I have a great counselor, and family, but I have always overthought, and for the most part am in charge of stopping it, and do, but your help in writing is so much appreciated. Mary, OH

pamstegma May 2014
In OHIO: The Medicaid Estate Recovery program applies only to the estates of Medicaid recipients aged 55 years or older in the amount of all Medicaid benefits correctly paid after the individual attained age 55 and Medicaid benefits correctly paid to a person of any age that was permanently institutionalized. The decedent's estate, for Medicaid collection purposes, includes all real and personal property in which the Medicaid recipient had any legal interest at the moment before death, including assets conveyed to others at death via survivorship, transfer on death, joint assets, living trusts, payable on death assets, and life estates. A Medicaid recipient's house may be subject to estate recovery. However, if the recipient was permanently institutionalized, any claim from the sale of a house may be delayed while the recipient's sibling or child resides in the home, if specific conditions are met.

vegaslady May 2014
NO, you do NOT need a trust or will to transfer the property to your son. Those of course are options but there is also joint tenancy (which has drawbacks) and yet another way which I intend to use myself. I just attended a senior law program in NV which included this issue. You can prepare a Transfer on Death Deed for real property and this asset transfers and is not included in probate and is NOT subject to debts of the beneficiary during the lifetime of the owner. You can do the same thing for vehicles and bank accounts. Each state would have its own details to fine tune this (for example, no lienholder on the car). If these are the only assets, what is left to subject to will and probate? Household furniture, clothes? In NV there are four levels of probate, depending on the amount of the estate. If what's left after those assets are deeded upon death is under $20k there is a simple probate here where you file an Affidavit of Entitlement. The other levels of probate are determined by the value of the estate of the decedent. Do not worry about paying back benefits received in the form of Food Stamps. It doesn't happen. That's a federal program you never have to repay (unless obtained fraudulently or somehow inadvertently get overpaid). Also, there should be no worry about SSI benefits. As for medical, if you should happen to have Medicare as well as Medicaid, Medicare pays first and doesn't have to be repaid. If you think your MEDICAID may kick in due to nursing home care in the future, talk to your elder law attorney about priority of claims on your assets. By the way, if the attorney who has drawn up the will didn't tell you how to transfer the house, car or bank accounts with deeds upon death, ask him why he didn't. If you don't think he has a very good explanation, get a better qualified elder law attorney for a second opinion.

sweetmary52 May 2014
Thank you. I can use more comments from you all, I have to sign it and pick it up soon, so I dont know the terminology used yet. I was told options, and I know he knows what he is doing, but I had a migraine, and had taken a migraine pill, and dont know legal jargon. I know I have to pick up the will and deed, my daughter is appointed exutrix, house to be deeded to my son, now in my name. Thanks mw

3pinkroses May 2014
Yes, you need to put the home into a trust as stated by Debralee. Not just a will and hopefully do it soon. Only with a the home in a trust can you avoid probate. Good luck.

Labs4me May 2014
Seeking the advice of your attorney is a smart move. Hopefully he is experienced in estate planning. If you put your home in a will, the home will not avoid probate. You need to put your home in a type of trust either revocable or irrecovable. Your attorney should have explained all your options.

GardenArtist May 2014
Really, the best person to respond to your concerns is your attorney.

From your description, it sounds as if you hold title to the home individually, rather than jointly with your son, but that on your death your son will inherit the home. Someone has to prepare the Deed, execute it and record it. Who will be doing that?

Did you designate a Personal Representative in your Will? Is that person your son or your attorney?

I'm not really sure what your concern is about your son being billed for your use of "medical, food and SSI".

Again, I would raise any concerns you have with your attorney who is the best person to implement your bequests.

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