How to handle the topic of tolieting when a parent is unable to wipe?

Too bad you don't seem to have anyone to talk care of, or you'd realize how crass and callous you're being.

You truly are desperate. Keep digging for hygiene posts - no matter how old they are. Sheer callous self promotion.

I appreciate your kind thoughtful answer with some very good tips. It is a delicate situation and I want to preserve his dignity as much as possible.

Just tell him what's happening (he knows already) and that you're going to help him now since he's losing functioning in his hands.

First thing to do is make sure he's wearing some type of brief, not regular underwear, so that even if the wiping isn't thorough you won't be dealing with a lot of stained clothing. Then make sure he gets changed and washed in that area regularly. If need be, you'll have to wipe him yourself. Use wet wipes.

Mom had ALS. At the end she was unable to get out of bed. She was in bed and used a diaper. And I changed her and wiped her clean when she pooed. It really wasn't that bad. I used wet wipes, gloves, put a trash can near the bed, and took out the trash when I was done right away. Just put on some gloves, hold your breath (breath through you mouth) and do it. You'll get used to it in no time.

can he still do a handstand in the shower? im trying to be helpful dammit, my thought process is just slow and methodical.