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bkburden Posted November 2020

The hospice nurse in my town did kill my mother.

When my mother came home from the hospital she gradually got better, Was able to walk, even sew some, she was a quilter. She gradually got to be almost herself again with getting around and such. The hospice nurse wouldn't let anyone else near my mother's meds, even though I had been her caretaker for many years. I didn't know why until after my mothers death. The nurse had taken away all medications that dealt with high blood sugar. My mother had high blood sugar from medications she was on. I begged the nurse and the Dr. to give her something for her sugar, but they wouldn't. So then all at once she started not able to get out of bed or walk, she ask me, "wasn't I getting better?" I said yes, of course I had no idea why she started not able to use her muscles. The reason was they were giving her meds for Parkinson's which she did not have. I had found the bottle after the fact, and I ask the Pharmacist what would happen if someone took those pills that didn't have Parkinson's? He said it would immobilize their muscles. So I figured out why she suddenly couldn't walk or get out of bed. The Dr. can no longer practice in the state of MO.

janiel Jan 2021
I believe you. My mother was on the road to recovery as well. Then suddenly she started going down hill. I didn't know it at the time, (just knew something wasent right) but all her medication was being withheld from her .. then food .. then water (claiming she could no longer swallow) all the while she is getting morphine pumped into her. My sister with the help of hospice knowingly, intentionally and purposely killed my mother. Oh! But it's all in the name of COMFORT!

Midkid58 Jan 2021
Med Mal attorneys take most cases on a contingency basis.

Get as much info as you can and find a med mal atty who will take your case.

Good Luck--this is heartbreaking.

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Starbuc1 Jan 2021
What Parkinson's medication was she taking? What was her primary hospice diagnosis? Drugs have many purposes and it is often not a straight forward as it seems. Pharmacists know meds but not about using them on actual patients with complex disease processes.

I get “recommendations” from pharmacists on a daily basis. They know nothing about the patients, their condition, their disease processes or their plan of care. They have an incomplete picture.

Reasons for stopping insulin are numerous and are often based on quality of life and again the disease process. For example, EBP and current research support the stoppage of insulin in a cancer diagnosis. Insulin is the wagon that carries sugar into cells. Cancer cells have a sweet tooth and using insulin feeds cancer growth by giving what they want... sugar.

If you would like to give me more specific information, I would give you an honest opinion on the care provided.

I would be happy to provide you with my nursing experience, my educational qualifications, etc. I have reviewed numerous cases involved in litigation.

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
Alva,

It was terribly sad. I am thrilled that you survived! You are indeed fortunate.

My sister in law discovered her lump in the shower. There was no breast cancer history in her family.

There is nothing sadder than seeing young children at a funeral. They don’t understand what is going on.

My mom and dad raised my cousins after my aunt and uncle died. One with cancer. The other kidney failure.

My youngest cousin was so confused. He kept asking to take medicine to the cemetery to give to his parents so they could become well again. It’s heartbreaking.

The oldest of my nieces is my goddaughter. I don’t have any grandchildren but I have several godchildren and great nieces and nephews that I love dearly.

AlvaDeer Nov 2020
NeedHelp, your Sister's story absolutely tears at me. My own cancer I found in my armpit. When I felt it, sitting in my underarm like an olive pit, I felt the blood drain from my head right down. I KNEW. I went to my gyne and he said "Well, you are due for a mammogram anyway, so we will put a beebee on this and get regular shots. They did microscopics. All negative. I went on vacation and came home and went to my regular doc and said "Gyne says this is nothing, but I want it OUT" and he said "Yeah, me too, because it is either an occult breast cancer gone out to the nodes, or it is lymphoma" .HE knew right away. Had I not followed up I would have been the story as well, as it was a very aggressive ER negative type gone to two nodes which fused together.
Misdiagnosis happens more than we want, that's for certain. I avoid Doctors like a plague despite my career as a nurse; I will never know what told me that lump wasn't OK. That was 34 years ago. I feel very lucky. I am so very sorry about your sister, and so thankful she got some justice of some kind. My own daughter was 18 at the time, and on her own newly, still needing to know she had a Mom around. I am so thankful I didn't have to go then. Now I am ready and she knows she will be fine then. But then I would have worried to leave her. Doctors do make mistakes. They are human. I have seen more than my share of them.

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
Alva,

I know it’s hard to win cases. I have a friend who tired of being a prosecuting attorney and switched to being a malpractice attorney.

In my sister in law’s case, the radiologist goofed! She had concrete proof.

She had two young children to provide for. She was divorced from my brother.

I was thrilled that she won her case. Sadly, she is deceased now.

She didn’t live long enough to see her daughter marry or see her grandchildren.

My other niece is single. They both left Louisiana after their mom’s death.

One is in Virginia and the other in California. They had a hard time dealing with the memories here.

funkygrandma59 Nov 2020
First I have to say how sorry I am for your loss. Sounds very fishy for sure.

But secondly I have to ask why in the world did you not make sure that your mom remained on her medications for her diabetes, and that you knew about all of her other medications until after the fact? I know you said that you asked them to put her back on them, and they didn't, but you should have gone over their heads, to make sure your mom was getting what she needed. My husband was under hospice care for 22 months in our home, and his nurse only came once a week for a half hour or so.(until the very end then they came more often) That pretty much is there protocol, so not really understanding how her nurse got to control mom's medications. I knew exactly what my husband was getting and what it was for, and I was the one who gave it to him and got to have the final say as to what he was taking as well. There was several times when his NP suggested he start taking something, and if I didn't feel it necessary, I would turn it down.

So while this whole situation is very sad and tragic, there are always 2 sides to every story, and all parties have to take their responsibility for their part. Praying for God's peace to be with you in the days ahead.

GardenArtist Nov 2020
BK, I'm so sorry to learn of this unsettling situation.  It's so traumatic to lose someone, let alone to know of these kinds of potential complications.   This is what I would do:

1.    Research your state's bar association for "medical malpractice" law firms.  You could also try a MedMal practice group through a local county bar association.    Good MedMal firms typically are members of these practice area specific groups.

2.    Research online to find some, perhaps a few, or just one, that appeals to you.   It will be hard, b/c some law firms practice only MedMal law, others a blend of that plus other practice areas.   And it's hard to determine if the firms are good.  Those that are sometimes hold seminars for their clients and clients' employees (not the "seminars" held in nursing homes by single practicing attorneys).    The good law firms have more professional approaches to their practice.

You'd probably want a plaintiff's law firm, since it would be the category to sue anyone.   A defense firm could offer could insight on whether or not there's a case, but these firms are compensated for less by the malpractice insurance carriers, and I doubt any would want to review the records for free.

3.    Ask for a consult; bring what medical records you have.  If you don't have any, you wouldn't necessarily need to get them before a meeting; attorneys can subpoena them and get them quicker.  

4.    This is what was done years ago when I worked in MedMal:  attorneys had the medical records reviewed by an NP or doctor in the appropriate field.   Whether the attorney took the case and pursued it was dependent on finding concurring opinions and evidence that a case did exist.

5.    Suing would be mitigated though by the fact that your mother has already passed, but removing bad medical people would be the alternate goal, and possibly getting some monetary remediation for the malpractice.  If there was malpractice, the doctor and nurse should be reported to the state's medical licensing board, as apparently the doctor already has been in MO.   (This is a real concern; in what state do you live? )

6.   Keep the medicine bottle and any other evidence you have, and bring it with you when you meet with the attorney.

I know this won't bring your mother back, but it might save someone else.   But do spend some time thinking it over and decide if you want to pursue this course of action.

Again, I'm saddened by the loss of your mother under these circumstances, and I would at least do what I've recommended.   If someone erred, I'd make sure that they were identified and sanctioned, if not prosecuted, and reported to Medicare.

AlvaDeer Nov 2020
NeedsHelp, I agree with you on all you say. I am saying, however, that this is an accusation of criminal behavior. It is an accusation we cannot conceivably know the truth or falseness of mistakeness of. I don't really see this as "venting".
If you have a family member who actually won a mal practice lawsuit I can tell you that you are the single only one I know of who has seen anyone win one of these things. And I have even had to testify in these.
I have seen people win in class actions, and they get about 300.00 to 1,500.00 on average to their Lawyer's millions. After years of paperwork and searching records and exams.
There are currently limits on recovery for malpractice that make it not worth a lawyer's time to take them, and they don't take them. A Lawyer who has lost license to practice won't even have malpractice insurance, and likely anything he had is now used up in lawyer's fees.
But again, whatever the case on all that, this is an accusation of criminal wrong doing. Murder committed by an MD and a nurse to be specific. Killing is not making a mistake in diagnosis. It is intentional killing. If suspected there is a way to address it.
Just my opinion. Your points are well taken. I do understand heartbreak and I do understand venting. But we seldom see accusations of murder.
If it happened, it is serious, and needs reporting. If it happened we can wonder at a motive here. I take very seriously what the OP reported here.

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
Alva,

I think the OP is heartbroken and distraught. She just needs to vent about her experience.

You are right. We can’t help her situation. No one can.

Perhaps a lawsuit. My sister in law won millions in a law suit when she wasn’t told about a malignancy that ended up being stage four breast cancer.

Saying it’s sad is a severe understatement.

I praise doctors and nurses for their hard work. Unfortunately, every profession has exceptions and people have died.

AlvaDeer Nov 2020
You are claiming either mal practice or murder. Or both.
Take great care in accusations of same; they can result in legal action for libel.
Accusations of murder start with a report to the police. Has this been done?
Or are you claiming mal practice by a doctor who is not allowed to practice any longer because of some wrong doing in this particular case?
This story is something that a Forum would be unable to comb out or advise on.
This is a matter for the police, and or a lawyer. Hopefully you have excellent evidence of all this wrong doing and have gone to the authorities already.

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
This is absolutely horrible! I am so very sorry. I am glad that the doctor can’t practice but that doesn’t bring your mom back.

My sweet grandfather used to say, “Doctors bury their mistakes!” I’d say that’s applicable in your case.

Is it possible to sue? I realize this won’t bring your mom back either but you should receive some sort of justice.

Something similar happened to my dear aunt, mom’s sister. She died in my mom’s arms as my mom was propping up her pillow. It was awful. She was given meds that a person with kidney disease should never have.

A pharmacist actually told my mom to sue but she was so heartbroken and said that it wouldn’t bring her sister back so she didn’t sue.

When my mom was in rehab I had an issue with them overmedicating mom. I told the director of nursing and social worker and they spoke to the nurse.

The nurse admitted that she had given mom twice the amount of her Parkinson’s meds so she wouldn’t have to make a second trip back to her room. Fortunately, mom was okay afterwards.

Mistakes do happen on occasion but for someone to die it is horrible!

My sister in law wasn’t told about a malignancy and she ended up with stage four breasts cancer. Had both breasts removed, reconstruction, bone marrow, the whole bit. She sued for millions and won the case.

I am so very sorry that you lost your mom. There are no words to make this better. It’s heartbreaking.

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