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My mother has stage 4 cops and is in the hospital. She was on hospice and I was her caregiver for a yr (unpaid trying for full yr to get her in Medicaid). At signs of her mind going and becoming very combative she was hospitalized. My Aunt is her general power of attorney tells me that mom received her Medicaid after she went to hospital. She has since been with no visitators due to Covid except for her niece who took over directive during a prior trip to hospital because I was advised not to visit because she would convince me to take her home.


She was sent home anyway on home health and I again was caregiver. While in the hospital now she is diagnosed also with dementia and recently moved to a new observation unit just opened in the hospital and then return to a regular room. Her niece was her only visitor allowed because my mother fell and hospital dropped the ball in calling family. She is now awaiting a nursing home needing acute skilled care and my Aunt is pushing the sale of mom's home to her own son which will penalize my mom causing her to lose Medicaid and have to spend down and reapply for her Medicaid.


I kept telling her I think this is a bad idea because long term care will require Medicaid and it took a yr and adult protective service to get it in first place. My aunt continues to repeat I don't know what I'm doing I'm only doing what SS is telling me I have to do. This is making me sick because I think it's not a good idea and mom's niece before walking away banned me from speaking to my mother. Plz help me help my mom. Any suggestion to insure me that what they are doing is the right thing. I don't want my mother's home but I have lived here 4 yrs and saving Medicaid a yrs worth of money. I have no job and on Medicaid myself and will be homeless but all I want is for my mom to be okay and so tired of crying everyday because I'm scared for her.

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You and your aunt would benefit from a meeting with an Elder Law Attorney in your state, who could review the facts of your mother's case and explain how the Medicaid eligibility regulations in your state can protect you and your family.

You mentioned that you are a Medicaid member yourself, and that you have cared for your mother for several years. These facts could fit several exceptions to Medicaid asset transfer rules that would allow transfer of the house with no penalty to your mother. Even if you don't want to keep the house there are ways to sell it and allocate the real estate sale proceeds without disqualifying your mother from Medicaid.

But we can't guess here about the specifics, your best options, and how to the facts must be presented to the Medicaid agency in your state. That's what an Elder Law Attorney in your state does for you.

A bonus for you and your aunt is the objective view that the Elder Law Attorney gives both of you, after he or she has listened to all sides of your story.

Everyone here understands the grief that goes with your mother's declining mental and physical health, so we know it's not easy to budget the time and money to find the Attorney who is best suited to help you.

After you get the clear picture of how the Medicaid regulations can help in your specific circumstances you may find the effort has brought you greater peace of mind.
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You need to visit Medicaid and explain that you are a resident, a child and a caregiver. The only problem you have is you need to prove you can pay the upkeep. Its worth a try.

Aunt has to sell the house at Market Value. If not, it will cause Medicaid penalties so you may want to mention that to her.
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Your Aunt is the general power of attorney. If she sells the home you are correct, this money will be spent on your mother's care. I do not know if your mother has left something to you in a will? Do you know? Whether your Mom's house is sold now, or recovered later by medicare after sale of the home, the monies for your Mom's care will come from the assets of the home.
In all honesty your Mom gave your Aunt this power, and she now has it. You are a bit at her mercy. Am I correct that your aunt has had all legal power conferred upon her by your Mom? And that your Mom is no longer competent enough to change this, even were she willing.
If all of this is true then it matter little what your Aunt's choice is. She seems unwilling to discuss with you what your own disposition will be, whether there are funds taht are left to you by your Mom, and etc. Without her cooperation it would seem you are somewhat helpless. You may want to check in with an Elder Law Attorney and all the facts; an hour of time is often money well spent to make plans for yourself moving forward. It does appear that you are going to be left to your own devices, so it is time to move forward with plans for your own protection as well as you are able.
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If you can prove that you have lived in the home for two years and that if you had not, your mother would have been in the nursing home, the home can be protected from a Medicaid claim.

Your aunt needs to consult a lawyer who is well versed in the Medicaid rules in your mom's state. RIght now, your aunt's plan is not in your mom's best interest. She may certainly sell the home but she must get market value (and be able to prove it) or your mother's Medicaid claim will be denied. Someone posted on this exact topic recently.

At the very least, encourage your aunt to get the home independently appraised before selling it to her son.
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