I am a caregiver to my 87-year-old mother in my home. She reported me for elder abuse. How do I deal with that?
She wrote a letter to the daughter of her friend, telling her that food was being withheld (I monitor her diet for salt, sugar, starch & carbs as she is diabetic and has high blood pressure); there was no privacy (for us!! not her); that she never got out (unless you call four trips a week to the hairdresser, bank, grocery, WalMart being confined) and that people were opening her mail and listening to her phone conversations etc.
The letter was forwarded to the police which resulted in visits by them and the supervisor of her care agency. Needless to say, this was a shock and bad surprise for me.......I immediately called a meeting with my brother and of course, she went on the defensive and was angry to have been discovered.
When asked why she wrote the letter and didn't voice her complaints, she said "it wasn't meant for publication". I was angry and ashamed of her that she took this action especially after I had created a 3-bedroom apartment in my large home for her with every luxury!
I discovered she had been phoning all kinds of people to obtain sympathy for herself. The wake-up call came when she went to visit two care facilities and discovered just how the seniors there were treated - and especially when she found out what kind of food they were served!!