How do you end arguments over returning home from Assisted Living after 2 months, when no family can provide a support structure from it?

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JO:

I assume you're not the one returning from AL. If that's the case, read on.

No family "can" or no family "won't"? Sounds to me like everyone else doesn't want to be bothered at all, and instead of sharing the responsibility they're trying to flip the script on you. Bottom line is that you can't do this alone, so remain assertive but open to suggestions.

Try identifying exactly what the individual needs help with, make a care plan complete with schedules, and present it to them as a family issue that requires everyone's input.

If that doesn't work, suggest they all pitch in to hire a Home Health Aide.

Good luck my friend, and let me know what happens.

-- ED
Two months is a little too short to be deciding on whether an ALF is a good fit. But, depending on your loved one's situation, it is possible for him/her to live at home with a lot of planning and in-home care. However, the bottom line is, wherever your parent lives it requires that someone locally can check in with them and see if they are getting the best care possible.
Is it possible for your parent to move closer to a family member?
I think we need more info here before we can provide a few answers. And Ed is correct: the person who volunteers to take on this responsibility will most likely have it for life with little or no help from the fam. It is sad that it happens to be this way.
There are 3 nieces incl. me locally sharing the responsibility; our aunt has no children. As I am also the primary caregiver for my parents with little sibling help, I can't take on more care for my aunt and am being assertive about that. Had a talk w/ my aunt other day, told her it was too much of a burden for her neighbors to take care of her and her nieces can't do what they used to do. Seemed to help aunt realize she's better staying where she is. Hope this lasts but I realize another crisis is around the corner.
Appreciate your advice edvierajr and lilliput.
Sounds like everything will be okay for now. Good that you stood firm about offering more assistance...you already have enough on your plate.
If you like the ALF she is in and you are all checking in on her, that sounds like she is being attended to.
I understand her anxiety. No one wants to go to a facility - no matter how nice it is. I am working really hard to keep my Mom out of one, but, if I can no longer provide her medical assistance and a safe environemnt, we will have to look at other alternatives.
Bless you for caring for both your parents and aunt.

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