I am fed up with my greedy sibling.

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My sister has recently had me removed as my mom's POA and joint checking. She regularly charges mom big $$$$ for her visits (long distance) and always leaves with some of mom's valuables, yet pitches a fit if mom gives me so much as a tea cup. I've avoided taking $$$ or valuables offered by my mom to avoid these scenes. Anyway, I'm totally fed up with being the dutiful daughter while my sis, who visits only when mom's not sick, gets the money, stuff and makes me out to be a villain.


How did she have you removed as your mom's POA? Is your mom living with you and are you her caregiver? I can see your frustration. You may need to take some type of legal action.
No, my mom is in assisted living. I live 500 miles away but have been driving there, on average, every other week of late because of frequent falls. My sis (who flies in a couple times a year) just accused me of stealing $40,000 from mom, though bank records show I just transferred funds from one of mom's accounts to another, after she asked me to do this in the presence of her attorney. Mom approved the lawyer removing me as POA and went with my sister to banks to have me removed from joint checking. A trusted caregiver is now performing both these functions, but it still hurts, big time. By the way, sis also accused me of stealing half my mom's clothes this week. I put winter clothes in storage to make more room in closets. This is ridiculous. I feel betrayed by my mom, who insists she trusts me but takes actions that cast doubt. I'm sick up to here!!!! Thanks for your support. I am exploring legal action
I'm glad a third party is handling your mother's assets. I wonder if your sister will accuse them of stealing too? It's the whole 'love of money being the root of all evil' Gee, I wonder who said that first? Oh I know.... GOD!!
It is a shame that people grow old and get greedy. As kids we played together and had fun. Together we would make plans on what fun things to do on vacations. Then we grow up and someone gets greedy. I have been estranged from my two siblings for close to eight years now because of greed. For some reason some people see their aging parents as easy money. SAD!!!!

And I just finished describing your sister as the epitome of what caregiving should be all about: respect and unconditional love!!! No wonder you referred to her as your "sibling" instead of giving a name. I feel ... ... ... used.

Well, at least you know her love comes with a price tag. "Thou shalt not steal," but I hope she can sleep a bit at night. ... Bet she'll try to be your best friend after Mom and all that money is gone.

-- Ed

Thanks for your support. I totally lost it with my mom today after she told me sis is taking her to bank tomorrow to close her safe deposit box, which likely means sis will take whatever's in there. I'm basically ready to let sis take over the care giving. I'm totally fed up.
I would go with them to close the safe deposit box if possible. My mother didn't have much, just a mobile home. My brother took the mobile home. My sister took my mother to Secretary of State and had my Mom tell them that she lost her title and was giving her car to my brother (after I paid the car off, put new tires on it, had brakes and gas tank leak fixed and paid medical bills with a total of close to $5,000).
I know all too well about greedy siblings they don't become greedy when they get older they are greedy as children also. It was a sin and a shame; sad touching and pathetic the things I had to put up with when my mother passed away my sister only came to visit so she could type up the will and she stayed because she had to live in this state to be executor of the will however she never helped out in any other capacity when the will was out of probate she left the state.... next she had my father do a living trust because she wouldn't have to come back to this state for that; unfortunately he agreed. My mother had Lou Gherigs disease; I fed her wiped her but paid all her bills but they didn't want me to handle the will when I already lived in this state and do you know why? Greedy arogant sibling.
my parents were divorced
I was appointed conservator of person and estate after I showed PROBATE that my sister was flying from Florida to Connecticut, putting mom (with severe dementia) in the passenger seat of her RENTED car) and getting bank checks because I held the checkbook. I was POA at this time.
The checking account went to ZERO.
You have to have documented proof and stay very clam at the hearings to show the Judge you are the opposite of the sibling. There is one in every family I have been told.
My mom is much better off with me in charge and my sister has not come back up as she now knows she is "CUT OFF" legally, from ever getting another penny.
I still do not like Probate. Once you go that route, they literally continue to suck the conserved person dry, through hearings and annual accounting's that are required.
Now we need a trustee to move money from WELLS FARGO to her credit union so I can pay bills. Probate will not let me do this since the conservatorship was contested....BY, my sister. I find this stupid since she acted like she was auditioning for a JERRY SPRINGER show at every hearing.
Now that will be a new bill, paying an attorney to be her trustee.
Nobody said this would be easy, and thankless.
Good luck and knowing you are not alone, should make you feel better. You cannot change your sister, but you can change how you react to her.

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