My aging parent is dying. Help with telling siblings?

If your parent does not have Hospice now..This is the time to call and get them into the house.
Not only will they help you and your parent the Social Worker might be a good place to start in trying to build or re-build this bridge.
The Social Worker might be able to help your parent see that it would be a good idea to inform family and friends at this time.
But that said if this is their wish and they are aware of the decision they are making then that is one that you should abide by. Although it would break my heart to be in your position.
((hugs))

I am sorry that you are in this circumstance. As you have said, your parent has given you clear instructions. Do you have a relationship with your siblings greater than the one you described your parent having?

Regardless this isn’t your decision. Don’t assume more responsibility than you have. You have quite a lot already.

The calls will most likely be harder on you than them although they may be shocked at the news. Do you call them often? If not, they will probably know when they see your number.

I can tell you that for me when both parents were gone, siblings became even more precious. Write out what you want to say. Date, time, any plans for a service if that isn’t known when you call or just leave it open. Are the other two siblings close? The first you call might offer to call the second one.

I would ask my parent to do me the courtesy of leaving a will. If that has been taken care of then the will should speak for the parent and cause you a lot less distress dealing with whatever comes next from the siblings.

Since the parent is of sound mind then those details should be easy enough to deal with.

Have you discussed hospice? Will that be at home or in a facility?

You matter to. You will be presumably living in the neighborhood and be receiving condolences. I would plan my responses accordingly. “The condition was advanced. There was a wish for privacy”. Something to ease the situation and move along and keep you from having to explain over and over. I think sometimes people were closer friends though life but in the end lose the connection. But please do find someone you can trust and are able to discuss these events with.
Many of us have been where you are in the realization that we are in the final days of a parents life and posters do find it comforting to come here for support and hugs. We care. Let us know how it goes.

Oh my, that's a tough spot to be in. I had something similar happen to me recently in that a dear friend confided in me about his illness and surgery asking that I not share it with anyone else. (We shared close personal friends.) It was hard, but, I honored his request. As it turns out, after he died, we shared stories and he had told all of us something, just not how dire it was. But, I am glad I honored his wishes. I'd do the same for my parent if they were competent. It's really their decision to make.