Hi, thank you for being there. You all are a great resource and support.
My husband and I are 60 yo and this year we both have noticed a decline in our health. He is the king of all do-it-yourselfers. Sure it saves us a lot of money, but he makes up for that with the time he has to put into everything and often projects have to wait years before he will get to them and when he does, it usually takes 5-10 times longer than if we would've hired someone. If I complain or push, he goes on the defensive and offensive. He grew up very poor and it seems to have impacted him in being extremely frugal and doing everything for himself. He hates it if I hire anyone to do anything.
He can't abide the thought of hiring an attorney to draw up a will/trust. Once he told me if I went forward with an attorney for that, he wouldn't sign any documents and he would deny/negate everything I wrote in the will. I started looking for cheap alternatives to an attorney, but I think we might be a little more complicated than what very cheap will preparers offer. I finally found a firm that draws up wills/trusts and offers package deals. They do the upfront work, they are not for use after we both have passed. The price is grudgingly acceptable to hubs and he's given his consent for me to use them. However, he still gets very upset if I ask him the ?s I have to fill out on the documents. In addition, he said he's not going to fill out his documents. Since we're having reciprocal wills, it's not going to work if he won't fill out or sign the docs.
Also, I've always had poor health and he's had robust health. He's been the bread winner and I've mostly been at home. I've told him he must have some ulterior designs as to why he won't participate in this. We've been married 34 years. God has been my rock, refuge and comfort. God did a miracle in hubby and the last 9 years have been a big improvement over the first 25. He found software to draw up a will, but I looked through it and it's a piece of generic garbage that ultimately doesn't mean a thing and wouldn't hold up in any court.
I'd appreciate any thoughts as to how I should proceed. Take the bad with the good. I said I would, and I did and I do. Any helpful advice is much appreciated. Thanks