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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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We ended up getting two monitors for my parents' bed.
For my mom, a mat that is placed on top of the mattress she sleeps on, that sets off an alarm when she tries to stand up or moves about.
For my dad, one on the floor that has motion detection and sets of an alarm when he puts his feet on the floor on his side of the bed.
The alarms can only be heard by a handheld device by their caregiver.
Perhaps an alarm of some sort will allow someone to get to your mom before she has a chance to fall, or at least notify someone when she is moving around?
My dad was also prescribed meds by a neurologist to help him sleep through the night. It has helped.
Many of us get up multiple times a night. At 82 I certainly do. Problem here is why Mom is passing out, because that isn't coming from getting up to the bathroom. My first suspect as an old retired RN is that there is some orthostatic hypotension going on. That is to say the blood pressure is changing when she arises from bed, is lowering. Moving to fast with the changes in position in age is difficult on both blood pressure and flow to the brain. Should be done slowly. I would begin by being certain a good (Omron) blood pressure machine (arm cuff measurement, not wrist) is used to measure blood pressure a.m. and p.m. Then do some measurements on lying flat, and then standing. Elders are often on medications that lower pressure. Sometimes their pressure is high in offices; they get meds prescribed, and then is normal at home and the medications become a danger.
In any case, this is something to discuss with and follow up on with the doctor.
Thank you AlvaDeer. I definitely believe it is her blood pressure but I’m not sure how I can help. I live with her and do my best to listen when she gets up until she gets back in bed. I sleep across from her room. When she passed out she had gotten up to go to the bathroom and when heading back to bed, fainted. I was close but not close enough to catch her. This happened one morning as well but i was able to catch her before she fully passed out… She also doesn’t take any meds but I like the idea of maybe giving her Melatonin or something to help her sleep. She definitely doesn’t get enough sleep at night and barely nods off during the day…. Thank you for your thoughts..
Did you find her passed out on the floor, or did you witness her passing out? I'm asking because if you found her that way, she could have fallen first and then passed out. It makes a difference if she's falling due to balance issues, rather than bonking her head on the way down and knocking herself out.
When you say she "passed out", this could a blood pressure problem or a vagus nerve issue (which is very common in the elderly). My MIL, in a LTC facility, would pass out while sitting on the toilet every once in a while and the staff told me it was a common vagus nerve reaction.
As others have suggested, maybe a sleep aid medication would help. Or make sure she's not napping much during the day, also getting some physical exercise.
Another strategy to keep her in bed is to put her mattress on the floor, or purchase a concave mattress that makes it more difficult for her to get up and out.
My very elderly Aunt with advanced dementia (and could not walk without a walker or support from another person w/belt) was being cared for in her home and her bed had all types of barriers around it, even though she had no history of getting up at night. But then 1 night she got up and shimmied past the barriers, fell and broke her hip. She died in the rehab facility, possibly from a post-break clot. I was in the process of figuring out where she would go after rehab since even in that facility with a broken hip she was still attempting to get out of bed (and once even trying to climb out the window).
It is often said on this forum that falling is the beginning of the end for elders because it is such a difficult care issue to address.
You don't give us enough other information about your Mom, so more would be helpful.
This is when it's time for professional care. The issue is not only that you, a family caregiver, aren't getting enough sleep to be a good caregiver during the day. It's that mom is not safe at home when she's up and about with no supervision. She could get out of the house, end up in the middle of the road, and be run over by a car. My neighbor's mom in a similar situation took off all her clothes one October night and strolled down the street, naked. Shortly thereafter the dear lady entered memory care.
You may have planned to be mom's caregiver until the end. Our plans don't always work out. I'm sorry you're facing this difficult situation.
Is your mother the caregiver for Dad? Or is Mom the parent with dementia ? Have you spoken to the doctor ?
Either way if this is not working at home , perhaps it’s time to either hire help to come into the home or have the parent with dementia live at memory care .
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
For my mom, a mat that is placed on top of the mattress she sleeps on, that sets off an alarm when she tries to stand up or moves about.
For my dad, one on the floor that has motion detection and sets of an alarm when he puts his feet on the floor on his side of the bed.
The alarms can only be heard by a handheld device by their caregiver.
Perhaps an alarm of some sort will allow someone to get to your mom before she has a chance to fall, or at least notify someone when she is moving around?
My dad was also prescribed meds by a neurologist to help him sleep through the night. It has helped.
I hope you find something that works for you.
Problem here is why Mom is passing out, because that isn't coming from getting up to the bathroom.
My first suspect as an old retired RN is that there is some orthostatic hypotension going on. That is to say the blood pressure is changing when she arises from bed, is lowering. Moving to fast with the changes in position in age is difficult on both blood pressure and flow to the brain. Should be done slowly. I would begin by being certain a good (Omron) blood pressure machine (arm cuff measurement, not wrist) is used to measure blood pressure a.m. and p.m. Then do some measurements on lying flat, and then standing.
Elders are often on medications that lower pressure. Sometimes their pressure is high in offices; they get meds prescribed, and then is normal at home and the medications become a danger.
In any case, this is something to discuss with and follow up on with the doctor.
Did you find her passed out on the floor, or did you witness her passing out? I'm asking because if you found her that way, she could have fallen first and then passed out. It makes a difference if she's falling due to balance issues, rather than bonking her head on the way down and knocking herself out.
When you say she "passed out", this could a blood pressure problem or a vagus nerve issue (which is very common in the elderly). My MIL, in a LTC facility, would pass out while sitting on the toilet every once in a while and the staff told me it was a common vagus nerve reaction.
As others have suggested, maybe a sleep aid medication would help. Or make sure she's not napping much during the day, also getting some physical exercise.
Another strategy to keep her in bed is to put her mattress on the floor, or purchase a concave mattress that makes it more difficult for her to get up and out.
My very elderly Aunt with advanced dementia (and could not walk without a walker or support from another person w/belt) was being cared for in her home and her bed had all types of barriers around it, even though she had no history of getting up at night. But then 1 night she got up and shimmied past the barriers, fell and broke her hip. She died in the rehab facility, possibly from a post-break clot. I was in the process of figuring out where she would go after rehab since even in that facility with a broken hip she was still attempting to get out of bed (and once even trying to climb out the window).
It is often said on this forum that falling is the beginning of the end for elders because it is such a difficult care issue to address.
You don't give us enough other information about your Mom, so more would be helpful.
You may have planned to be mom's caregiver until the end. Our plans don't always work out. I'm sorry you're facing this difficult situation.
Have you spoken to the doctor ?
Either way if this is not working at home , perhaps it’s time to either hire help to come into the home or have the parent with dementia live at memory care .