I am trying my hardest to get my mother into a nursing home. I can not take care of her its real hard to care for someone who don't want your help. She fights me on everything. I have done all the things I was told to do by my social worker, and nothing. I will tell everyone this is the hardest thing I have ever done. Everyone tells you what you should do and what I am doing wrong but are not here 24/7. I am, I try to tell them but I am the bad one so I stop talking to them and that was my sister, I just don't know what to do next!!!! thanks for letting me vent.

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You are so correct, I was just thinking about this today while I was working. No one who hasn't taken on taking care of their elderly parents, cannot in any way imagine what it's like being in the trenches every day, 24/7. It's our parents, they push every button we've got. Nothing my whole life prepared me for what it would be like to take on care of a parent with dementia. I have been to Hell and back in my lifetime, I thought two simultaneous custody fights for 15 years. But taking care of my father took me to my knees, not to say there have been many moments of joy and closeness which I've never experienced before with my father, him being a classic narcissist. I can care for him physically comma with no problem whatsoever. But emotionally, it's the hardest thing I've ever done. He's 88, in perfect physical health, resting heart rate of 48, perfect blood pressure no health problems whatsoever. But he has a forceful personality, and is completely self-centered, but funny and brilliant. He's been in the nursing home for 5 weeks now, and I'm reclaiming my life. Everyone is told me while I was in the middle of it you got to do self-care, you have to take care of yourself. They don't understand there's not a minute to do so hardly. I don't know what I would have done without these forms, I've learned so much and continue to do so. And the support and compassion from all of y'all is amazing.
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helpneediterri, don't you love people giving you advice on what to do and not to do when they never been in your shoes taking care of your Mother :P

You really have your hands full especially since your Mom has Alzheimer's/Dementia [per your profile]. Yes, it is probably time to see if you can get Mom into a skilled nursing home.

If your Mother cannot budget for the cost of a nursing home, then check with your State Medicaid office to see if Mom can apply and be approved. If yes, then Medicaid will place Mom in a nursing home and pay for her room/board and costs. It's worth checking into.
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