So me and my mom care for my gran as she lives with us and one of her health problems is incontinence.
She wears pads as she refuses the pull ups. She doesnt wear the correct ones and we have to put a night time tenalady on top of the incontinence pad but nurses have said it's better than nothing and if she accepts that it's better not to argue. However our problem now is she wont use them properly of a night. She'll call out probably every half hour to an hour for someone to take her to the bathroom and when you say just wee on the pad she shouts no so were having to get up each time of fear she'll have a fall going to the bathroom as her walking isnt great. We got her a commode but she refused to use that. It's just getting to the point now where were getting next to no sleep and we end up snapping at each other because of this. Also when she does go to the toilet she sometimes does nothing which is so frustrating. I'm starting to think is this an early dementia/Alzheimer's sign or is it just typical her as she has always been a stubborn person. Is there anything we can do or say that will get her to use them properly and is this normal?