Follow
Share

Well before you ask the obvious questions. No, I don't have strong men in the family close by to help. :/ SHe's in a nursing home in Illinois, the people that work there would get her in the car for me...but then I have to drive to Indiana. My husband would be able to help me get her out of the car but then what? And he's leaving for work before she would want to go back. Are there medical agencies that could help with transporting her from the car to the house? Or some type of ramp service? My mom died at years ago. I have no siblings or aunts uncles on this side of the family. Cousins live too far. Her medical affairs stress me out enough...now this.. she will He me forever if she has to spend Thanksgiving in the nursing home. .help? P's I'm in the process of moving her from Illinois to Indiana

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Before Mama became bedfast, one of my aunts with whom she was particularly close, was critically ill and in the final hours of life...Mama wanted to see her, as did I. Mama was able to go in her wheelchair...getting her in the car and out of that by myself was a challenge...but we made it...THEN...arriving at my aunts home, which I knew already, there were six rather steep concrete steps. We have a lot of strong men in our family so they all hoisted her up the steps (not in her chair) but two on each side..which was terrifying for me and for her...what if they dropped her....we made it fine...I brought in the chair and she sat in that beside her sister in law until time to leave then the same men toted her down the stairs..again...terrifying...THEN...her blood sugar spiked or maybe it was the stress, or fear or whatever, but she almost passed out...the hospice folks there checked her out and we finally made it home, again, I had to help her out of the car into the chair then into the house etc...it was quite an adventure..but I am glad Mama and I both got to see my aunt...but it is not easy....and when I say chair, while she does have one of those, we used her rollator that has the little chair on that so she can sit in it and I can roll her...which saved us on various trips to the doctor before she became bedfast....good luck...it's hard not to include them when they really want to be there..
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Thank you all for the help. My grandma determined to be here cause she has no one else. Ive brought her to my old house before and it was one step and easy to lift her from the chair to the couch. Shes only 80 pounds. and busdriver25 that's an awesome idea. Why? Cus the back of my house shares the alley to the police station and town hall. I could Def ask them. Thank you all.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Maybe you could ask the local police department or fire department if they have any ideas. I know that our police will help move someone in a wheelchair if they are not busy. Never hurts to ask.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Transporting the elderly is hard to do on short notice; especially with the assistance you need. Best to visit and take her out to dinner nearby. It is the safest for you both.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Are you sure your grandmother really wants to come to your home? I can recall my grandmother and several of her friends discussing the trauma of going out for the holidays, but not wanting to disappoint the family, or the family insisting despite their protests. At some point the discomfort involved with the travel and the commotion of too many people just outweighs the joy of the holidays.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Is she is a wheelchair? Or does she just have poor mobility? WARNING. Either way, unless you are very familiar with assisting a person with poor mobility, it can be quite daunting. There is a risk of falling. I would be very cautious and practice before you leave the facility so you can see how it's going to work

I would be very wary of taking her out of the state. What if there was an accident? If she fell or there was a car accident, what would happen to her? It's too risky, IMO.

Plus, those portable ramps are quite heavy. They also don't work that well for a steep incline. We have one at my office and it's tough getting them to work on 3 steps. I would never attempt them on 6 steps. If both of you fell and broke bones, I can't imagine how horrible that would be.

As suggested above, I would visit with her and perhaps take her to a restaurant near her facility that has handicap access. You could even go a day in advance. It's the love that matters, not the exact time of the meal or visit.

Are you familiar with getting someone in and out of a car and into a wheelchair? There is a way to do it. I would ask for advice. They place the chair behind the person with the wheels locked so that if they fall, the chair catches the fall. They also have the person place their arms around their neck for lifting. If don't know how to do this, you both could get hurt.

The height of the vehicle is also very important. Too high or too low can make it very difficult for them to get out of.

And will the wheelchair fit in your trunk? Can you lift it?

I transported my cousin many times to and from her doctor's office. It's a huge deal and each entry and exit is quite exhausting for the patient. I had to stop doing it. I'd be very hesitant to do it, unless you have plenty of help.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I think you can rent a ramp. Check with your medical supplies store to see if you can get one for a reasonable cost.

Another idea is to check to see if there is a Cracker Barrel in the area where gma lives. You can make reservations to have Thanksgiving dinner there. No cooking, no cleaning. You wouldn't have to worry about a ramp. You could just enjoy Thanksgiving dinner together without all the trauma. Holidays can be way too hard on us!
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

It is very kind of you to want to include Grandmother in your holiday activities. But especially on this short notice it just might not be feasible. There are temporary ramps and perhaps you could locate one locally if you had more time to work on it. Six steps is quite a steep drop, though, and will require a very long ramp to meet code for a handicap ramp. Even when she is living closer to you, getting her into your house is going to take some planning and effort.

Are you having other people at your home for that day? If it is just you and your husband, how about going instead to her location, taking her to a nice restaurant (which will have a handicap entrance) and enjoying the holiday that way?

Could you convince her to be satisfied with having a "thanksgiving" dinner to celebrate moving closer to you? Even then it might need to be held at an accessible venue.

I don't blame Grandmother for hating her limitations. I'd sympathize with her on that. But she has no cause for hating you, and you have no cause for feeling guilty. It is what it is and we can only do our best to cope.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

A long trip in a car will be hard on her. If you take her to a hospital outside of Illinois, say in Indiana, her Medicaid won't cover her. You let her be where she is. You visit the next day. That's the best you can do, sorry.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.