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Mojo007 Asked November 16, 2025

Mom's in nursing home/rehab. Stepdad has dementia still living in his house. Check on him daily but he seems to be getting worse. Any ideas?

Kalamazootx1 Nov 23, 2025
Sanw situation occurred with my inlaws. Found an assisted living that allowed them to be together. Hired a sitter to be with them 12 hrs/day. Facility is locked so as dementia progressed they were able to keep them from wandering at night .

Jennytrying Nov 23, 2025
Is it possible you StepDad and Mom can be moved together into an assisted living situation? Or some facility have assisted living connected to a rehabilitation center, that way your Dad can visit with mom daily yet have the facility take care of him and be with his peers while waiting for Mom to join him. Being alone with the beginning stages of dementia, along with the stress of your Mom away can really speed up the dementia development.

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Grandma1954 Nov 17, 2025
I am of the belief that a person with dementia should not be living alone.
Dad either needs caregivers while mom is in rehab. (You do not mention why but is there a possibility that she will be unable to SAFELY care for dad when she is discharged?)
Or this is the time that dad should be placed in Memory Care so that he is safe.
He will continue to get worse, people with dementia do not improve and with something like you mom not being there may have caused a faster decline.

Geaton777 Nov 17, 2025
I'm assuming your Mom has been your Dad's caregiver and she has the capacity to do this mentally. Your Dad, because of the change in routine, is probably disoriented and not faring well -- or, you just didn't realize how bad he was until your Mom was out of the picture.

How much longer will your Mom be in rehab? How old are your parents? What if your Mom returns home but is still not 100% to take care of your Dad?

Are you their PoA (if not, is anyone)?

I think solutions will depend on the answers to these questions. Please provide more information for context.

Daughterof1930 Nov 17, 2025
He’s likely no longer safe to live on his own, even with some checking in on him. A wife who’s returning from a hospital and rehab stay probably isn't up to being a caregiver to a person with dementia. Sounds like time for a new plan for stepdad, one that ensures he’s safe and cared for, either in memory care or full time helpers in home

AlvaDeer Nov 17, 2025
It sounds as though you are worried as to whether your father requires 24/7 care. If you are worried about it, the answer is that yes, he likely needs that supervision. He can enter respite care while his wife is recovering. My worry here is as to whether she can take over care upon return home. To be honest, I would take great care in assessing this. Sounds like things are already "happening" that would call this into question.
You don't really give us any information, so remember that the quality of our answers matches the quality of info we are provided often enough. I sure hope you might be able to elaborate a bit more; if not, be certain I wish you the best of luck.

lealonnie1 Nov 17, 2025
Yes. Place them both in long term care together with Medicaid if necessary.

MG8522 Nov 16, 2025
What is the long-term plan for your mother? Is it to return home after rehab, or to continue living in the nursing home? Can your stepdad be moved into the same facility, or could you find a room or suite for them to share in a different facility, rather than keeping him at home and the two of them apart?

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