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momissues Asked December 2020

How does everyone feel about mashing up anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds in my Mom's food so she doesn't know she's taking them?

My Mom had been a maniacal witch all her life. With the onset of age, and after suffering a few mini-strokes, her beastly behavior has risen to a totally new level altogether. My brother and husband can hardly stand being in her presence, and I can't really blame them for feeling that way.


On many occasions, I have broached the idea of anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds to her, but she has screamed at the top of her lungs that she refuses to take them. How do you all feel about the ethics of sneaking mashed up mood-enhancing meds into her food on the sly? Many, many thanks, again for your kind help!!

lealonnie1 Dec 2020
If your mother is a maniacal witch with beastly behavior who's ruining the quality of life for your family, you really ought to think about moving her OUT and into either Assisted Living or Skilled Nursing. Living with a person who's screaming at the top of her lungs when asked about taking medications isn't good for you, for your husband, your brother, or anyone else living in your home, which is supposed to be a safe haven for everyone.

If it were me, and my mother was acting like this, I'd give her a choice: take the medications prescribed for you by the doctor so we can ALL LIVE IN PEACE inside of this home or go to Assisted Living or Skilled Nursing. Choice A or Choice B, which will it be?

In the meantime, if you have a prescription for anti depressants/anti anxiety meds for your mother, I'd crush them up and put them in her food in a NEW YORK MINUTE.

Good luck!

cwillie Dec 2020
Double post 🙄

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AlvaDeer Dec 2020
Hmmmm. Is a maniacal witch a whole lot worse than a regular one?
Is your mother diagnosed? Are these prescription meds from her doctors?
If not, then NO. It isn't OK.
I think time now for a complete assessment with neuro-psyc, if you are her POA and caregiver.
Wishing you the very best of luck.
NeedHelpWithMom Dec 2020
Totally agree. We need to know if these are prescribed meds meant specifically for the person.

Otherwise, it is very wrong to give her drugs.
NeedHelpWithMom Dec 2020
Some people refuse meds. They are afraid of side effects. They may feel that only ‘crazy’ people take meds and so on.

Was she prescribed meds and refused to take them?

Has she taken them and experienced side effects?

Does she realize that meds have to be taken for a short time before receiving an appropriate response from them?

Give us a little more information please. Thanks.

Midkid58 Dec 2020
Ask the doc first, likely they'll be OK with this way of getting their meds in them.

And some taste absolutely horrible, hence the coating on them. I take Zoloft and once one got wet and was kind of dissolving so I grabbed it before it could 'melt' and OMG, the aftertaste was horrible. So--maybe before you try doing this, mash one of the pills and 'taste' it. You made need something fairly spicy or sweet to cover the taste.

(I remember mashing up tranquilizers in chocolate pudding when my YD had her first baby and subsequent high anxiety/blues. Asked her doc for the OK and got it. A half hour after eating 'pudding' she felt so much better and began to think she could, in fact raise this baby and she wouldn't have to give her to the local fire station.)

cwillie Dec 2020
As well as checking with the pharmacist about whether they "can" be crushed you might want to do a taste test of the results, if they are bitter or significantly change the flavour of her foods you may end up with her distrusting all of her food (maybe even convinced that you are trying to poison her).

Sfhoopes Dec 2020
If the doctor approved her taking the meds, I don’t have a problem with it. My mom went into decline, and it wasn’t until we were at the doc office that she admitted she wasn’t taking her morning meds. When we determined what was in the group, it was a blood pressure med and her mood/depression pill. Asked her why and she would shrug her shoulders or say she forgot. Happened more than once, so I’m in charge of her pills now. My grandma had the same problem where she just didn’t want to take pills anymore, so those that could be crushed were mixed in apple sauce. Just be sure that the pills can be crushed, some can be toxic if crushed.

funkygrandma59 Dec 2020
As long as the medications are prescribed for her(and no one else), then by all means, if they are crushable, put them in her food. Sounds like though if mom is against taking any kind of medications, getting her to see a Dr to get them prescribed might be a whole other issue. Good luck.

pevans5 Dec 2020
There is nothing wrong with this action as long as they are prescribed meds. This is exactly what they do at my mother's mental facility. As well as what they will do at any other place she will go. She needs them.

gladimhere Dec 2020
I would first check if the meds she has been prescribed can be crushed. Some cannot. If crushable then yes and hope it helps her behaviors.

Has she been checked fora UTI?

Gramjoy Dec 2020
After much thought, I did give my 97 year old mother a dose of Respiradol, crushed in her juice every morning. She was having hallucinations and delusions which were causing a lot of anxiety, both for her and for me. Not being able to understand the effects of aging and her heart and circulatory problems, she denied that there was anything wrong. Her palliative care NP prescribed the small dose and it made a significant difference for her. My job as her 24/7 caregiver became easier. Because I had medical POA, I moved beyond the guilt feelings I had at first and was glad that this medication helped her have more peaceful days.

Rbuser1 Dec 2020
Dear momissues, probably a lot of people have thought about doing something like that at some point. I couldn't do it. I wouldn't want to take a chance at it backfiring.
Also, everyone reacts differently to different meds. I would say don't do it. Respectfully.
take care.

ZippyZee Dec 2020
Do it. If she's prescribed them she needs to be taking them.

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