My aunts want me to get guardianship over my father who has Alzheimer's. I don't want that responsibility. Does that make me a bad daughter?

Do you have POA? If so you really don't need guardianship.

Rebecca;
You poor dear! I'm going to assume that you sent your mom to the hospital because she was ill/hurt and needed treatment, yes?

Do you think that it's likely that your mother would have died at home on about the same schedule as she did in the hospital?

Getting guardianship is a big step. Did your father appoint you to be his Power of Attorney or health care proxy?

No, of course you're not a bad daughter.

But when you say you "can't do that to" your Dad, can't do what?

Your aunts are perhaps correct in thinking that the most appropriate person to take charge of their brother's decisions is his child. Normally, it would be. And if your father can't make decisions for himself any more, then somebody has to do it for him.

It doesn't have to be you; and if you've had a bad experience of this role I'm sure we can all understand that you're not prepared to undergo something similar again.

That leaves two options.

1. Talk to your aunts about who else the family can entrust with this responsibility.

or, and only if you want to

2. Think through what exactly you're worried about, talk to a counsellor - or to us! - about how you can avoid the distress you went through before with your mother, and maybe reconsider whether with support and better communication this time mightn't be different, and mightn't help you lay some emotional ghosts to rest.