He is now in rehab? Have him evaluated for longterm. If he has any money can put it to private pay. If no money, can file for Medicaid. Hopefully there is a NH attached to the rehab. Talk to the Social Worker tell her there is no one who can take care of him. They can help u with Medicaid. With his health problems they can put him on Hospice. You will be responsible for nothing. Once on Medicaid the nursing home gives him a bed, a doctor, toiletries, diapers, 3 meals a day and snacks.
He has aortic heart damage, and wants to have open heart surgery to replace it. He lies to everyone, tries to have us all on 24 hour urgent demand. He refuses to even consider assisted living. He can no longer drive, is a chronic alcoholic, is confused about lots, has prostate cancer, has has 5 heart stents, has had three strokes. He won't share any of his medical history, only the parts he wants to. Adult protective services were called, but refused to do a home evaluation because "he is in an apartment building where others can look out for him". He refuses to take the senior shuttle because you have to call them 24 hours ahead of time. When we take him to the store, he steals things, yells at us, demands to go to many places. My question, Are we bad people if we stop our help so he can see he really isn't living independently ? He has no money, the case manager at the rehab center said he is the most manipulative person in her experience and "he always gets his way" How do you keep from feeling guilty about not helping him now? How can you stop helping him now when he is sick and old? I just spent 3 weeks there this summer and got him to go to the hospital, paid his cable and phone so it would get reconnected, and spent about 7-10 hours a day with his approval, cleaning 50 black trash bags, plus donating 2carloads of stuff from his apartment. Sorry for this long angry post, we have all had lots of counseling, panic attacks, depression, from being abandoned and abused by this man. When is it time to give up?
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He lies to everyone, tries to have us all on 24 hour urgent demand. He refuses to even consider assisted living. He can no longer drive, is a chronic alcoholic, is confused about lots, has prostate cancer, has has 5 heart stents, has had three strokes. He won't share any of his medical history, only the parts he wants to. Adult protective services were called, but refused to do a home evaluation because "he is in an apartment building where others can look out for him".
He refuses to take the senior shuttle because you have to call them 24 hours ahead of time. When we take him to the store, he steals things, yells at us, demands to go to many places.
My question, Are we bad people if we stop our help so he can see he really isn't living independently ? He has no money, the case manager at the rehab center said he is the most manipulative person in her experience and "he always gets his way"
How do you keep from feeling guilty about not helping him now? How can you stop helping him now when he is sick and old? I just spent 3 weeks there this summer and got him to go to the hospital, paid his cable and phone so it would get reconnected, and spent about 7-10 hours a day with his approval, cleaning 50 black trash bags, plus donating 2carloads of stuff from his apartment. Sorry for this long angry post, we have all had lots of counseling, panic attacks, depression, from being abandoned and abused by this man. When is it time to give up?
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