What can I do if assisted living is draining the estate?

Lucy, do you have a caseworker for your disability? If so, start there. If they don't have answers they will probably be able to direct you to someone who does. Another good resource is your county's Area Agency on Aging.

Can you give us more details? Does Mom own a home? Medicaid makes exceptions for persons with a disabled son or daughter.

I think ultimately you will be best served by consulting an elder law attorney (using Mom's funds ... you are doing this on her behalf) and finding out if there are ways to set aside some of Mom's funds for your use.

By "estate" I assume you mean her funds. They are there to be used for her care, unless they are in a trust.
When you say draining in $2000. increments, do you mean she is being charged 2k per month?

Lucy, yes Assisted Living self-pay can empty out a savings account pretty quickly. What you need to do if the estate is going to be drained is to have the patient apply for Medicaid [which is different from Medicare]. Call your State Medicaid office.

With Medicaid, chances are the patient will need to move to a skilled nursing home where Medicaid will pay for all the cost. But if the patient has a house, Medicaid will place a lien on said house so that they can be reimbursed.

If there is enough equity in the house, on option is to sell the house now and use the equity for the Assisted Living care, up until the time comes to use Medicaid.