How do I stop wishing my husband would go away?

It sounds like a long respite is in order. Don't you wish it was as easy to arrange as it is to say?

You sound overwhelmed by your current situation . It can be more helpful to break down the individual issues that you are having and seek solutions for those things that can be worked on.
Hugs to you. Caregiving can feel totally overwhelming and exhausting. Please remember to care for yourself in the meantime.

I had to chuckle,, my imaginary go to sleep dreams are of being by myself in a nice cabin somewhere with peace and quiet. You are not alone,, and no I wouldnt trade G for anyone.. but the fantasy is nice sometimes!

No, of cource not. Just wishing.

Are you thinking about making this happen?

Are you thinking about seeing a lawyer about divorce?