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allycec Asked December 2016

Can a live in parent donate to the monthly expenses of the sibling caring for her?

igloo572 Dec 2016
Siblings taking care of another sibling or living together is pretty common in some cultures. It's common enough that a sibling can submit an exemption to Medicaid estate recovery (MERP) for those that inherit a house from the sister/brother they were taking care of for TX MERP. It's kinda different than for children caregivers in that the sibling is older and already on SS & maybe also a pension so the financial need may not be as intense for them as it would be for a kid who leaves their job, salary, benefits, etc to caregive for their parent(s; yet having their older sister or brother move in with them has increased their living expenses but they really don't need personal income (as they have SS &/or retirement).

So Ally is this the situation? If so, here's my suggestion, if there is no mortgage still owed by the caregiver sibling who owns the home, then I'd have the live-in pay for 50% of all the monthly costs on the house; and they write a check for 50% of whatever each month for electric company, yard guys, etc. and paid to the vendor each month (no checks written to sibling). For groceries maybe have them use a debit card to pay 50% of it and then the other sibling pays the rest. I would NOT have them pay any of the property taxes or insurance as to be those are static costs no matter who or how many live in the house. IF this can work, then I would do that as probably no blowback from Medicaid or family later on. Their bank account would show payments to legitimate companies with no gifting involved. Now if there still is a mortgage and they are paying "rent", well for that I'd see an elder law atty to figure out just how to do a personal services contract & rental agreement and deal with the income increase. "income" for some on SS is sticky as they can't make $ above a certain amount without it becoming an issue for that SS payment. Plus rental income needs special tax filing. So you need an atty who understands how to make the #'s work.

I'd also look at what happens if the caregiver sister who is the property owner should die first as to what happens to the other sister. Like maybe an agreement that she can stay there 6 months afterwards; she may not do it but at least has that there so reduces panic.

They need to keep their finances separate.

freqflyer Dec 2016
Ally, do you mean help pay for some of the utility costs, groceries, gas money? Yes, a parent can help pay for 1/2 or 1/3 of such costs. Sorta like a room-mate situation. As cwillie mentioned above, draw up a contract that says what percentage the parent would be paying.

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cwillie Dec 2016
Sorry, what? Where is the parent living?
In general a person pays for the care they receive, they don't make a "donation", even if the caregiver is their family member and not an outsider. It is always better to draw up a legal contract for these things so that everyone is on the same page when it comes to duties and compensation and so that there is no snafu if there is ever a need to apply for medicaid somewhere in the future.

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