Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
M
Mike6320 Asked September 2015

Someone called APS on myself and my brother. Our home was found to be unacceptable. No what?

We both take care of our mother who has dementia. Will APS give us an opportunity to move (like a time limit) or will they have our mother removed from our home? The whole situation has been very upsetting to all involved.

GardenArtist Sep 2015
You've gotten good advice, especially treating APS with respect. Consider as CM suggested that this situation will be better for all of you if you're able to address the house issues.

So make APS your allies; swallow your pride and kiss up to them if you have to, and get them on your side so you can work together with their assistance and move forward.

You should have been told, in writing, what they feel needs to be done; call them, ask for assistance in finding someone to help (and paying for that help if necessary), and demonstrate that you're cooperating.

If you challenge them and/or don't make efforts to cooperate, they may remove your mother and place her somewhere else. It depends on the specific issues as well as your ability to cooperate.

If you need help and APS doesn't provide guidance, contact local churches; sometimes they'll reach out to help even if you're not a member. Habitat for Humanity and Christmas in Action provide building assistance, if they are issues beyond cleaning.

Good luck; I can't even imagine how unsettling this must be, but try to see if as a helpful intervention that can work for the betterment of all of you.

Countrymouse Sep 2015
It must have been very upsetting, but look on it as a starting point. APS must have said what was unacceptable, didn't they? Although depending on how upset everyone was, and how each of you reacted, it may be that they just ran for their lives and will be submitting a report sooner or later.

E/lass is right, the person to speak to is your mother's case manager. Try not to take anything as a personal criticism (I know it's hard, but it's important). You need to get to the bottom of what the concerns are and how they can be put right.

If the meeting went badly wrong and there was shouting and bedlam and goodness knows what else, then begin the conversation by offering an apology and explaining that because of the circumstances everyone was upset and you would like to start again. And try not to curse the person who called APS. In the long run, in spite of all that's happened so far, it may turn out to be for the best. Good luck, please let us know how you get on.

ADVERTISEMENT


Sunnygirl1 Sep 2015
What was wrong? I would imagine they would provide a list of problems and a timeline to have them remedied. Did they propose a plan for the compliance?

Eyerishlass Sep 2015
If APS found your home to be unacceptable did they not give you instructions on what you're supposed to do next? They just came in, said "Unacceptable!" and left?

Were you assigned a case manager? If so, I would contact that person to find out what you're supposed to do. Maybe it's an easy fix.

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter