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carriet Asked May 2015

My Mother's weight is down to 74 lbs, what can I do?

last weight was 93 over the winter, she lives by herself and suffers from mental illness. she is a vegetarion she says shes fine but i know shes not. who can help me? all i here is if shes not a danger to herself or others theres nothing anyone can do. please help

Melsimpson Jun 2015
Go to her doctor without her , get dr to order some blood tests, full blood count will show if her albumin is too low, and other issues. Get a pathology nurse to visit your mum when you are present, and take blood from her. See what doctor says about the results. Put her on Sustagen or more nutritious dinks. Your problem is that she needs to be monitored and have food prepared for her . Pehaps a nurse ? If she is unable to judge how to look after herself its time to seek an enduring power of attorney. good luck

GardenArtist Jun 2015
You have a dilemma. You don't want APS to become involved, and you certainly don't want to threaten her with that. On the other hand, you don't want to be accused of neglect yourself.

But obviously you're very concerned about her health.

When I've been in similar situations, I called EMS. I had to be firm and advise that I couldn't take take of someone if he wouldn't cooperate and get help when needed.

Thinking over your mother's drastic weight loss, that might be the route to take. I suspect when they check vitals they'll find something out of range and that may justify their taking her to the ER, which may be the only way you'll get her to go.

I think though that she's not able to care for herself properly, and to me that would equate to the fact that she's a danger to herself, although I also suspect she's in denial and doesn't understand she's flirting with danger.

Has your mother executed a Living Will or what's often called a medical power of attorney, and if so, are you named as having the authority to make decisions on her welfare? If so, read it well and confirm that you have the authority, then call EMS.

Your mother may get mad at you and make a scene when the paramedics come, as I get the impression she's an independent person even if she needs help.

Good luck; I know this must weigh heavily on your mind.

Wish I had some better suggestions.

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carriet Jun 2015
I have made an appointment for her, but she refuses to go, is there a way i could take legal action?

GardenArtist May 2015
Since she's a vegetarian as well, she could very well be anemic.

Does she get Meals on Wheels (even though meat is provided) or prepare her own meals?

Your profile states that you're caring for her. I assume you don't live with her? It doesn't sound as if she should be alone. Have you given any thought to an alternate possibility, such as assisted living (if she's up to it)?

Take her to a doctor ASAP, as FF suggested, her primary doctor or an internist. Actually, I might even take her to the ER; that level of weight is dangerous.

I don't know who told you there's nothing that can be done if she's not a danger to herself or others. That's nonsense; losing that much weight IS a danger.

freqflyer May 2015
Quickly make an appointment with your Mom's primary doctor... have the doctor run some tests. Losing 20 lbs in that short of span is a warning sign that something is amiss. She could be forgetting to eat.

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