My son and I care for my mom 24/7. My sis was suppose to show up Friday but she didn't. Should I address this?

Mom watched the game and enjoys my grand daughter. I had plan on spending weekend w grand daughter cuz Sis was going b here..Thx for positive feed back ..dementia is a hard disease to understand. Just got to enjoy the good times.

I am confused... you and your son care for your Mom who is 91 who has dementia, who is not very mobile, and needs to use the bathroom 6-10 times a hour, and wears a colonoscopy bag [as per your previous postings].... your sister was going to sit with your Mom so that you could drive 80 miles to pick up your grandbaby and to watch him play basketball. I assume this baby isn't an infant but a teenager.

Why couldn't the parent(s) of your grandson take him to the basketball game? Why did you have your Mom endure an 160 mile trip [probably three hours in the car] with her medical issues? Who was watching your Mom when you made your first 80 mile trip to get your grandson and another 80 miles back home? Who watched your Mom while you all were at the basketball game?

I would have waited at the house with Mom before even heading out to pick up the grandson, and when your sister didn't show up, I would have cancelled the trip to see the basketball game. Did your sister not come because of the weather, depending on where you live? Did she have the weekends mixed up?

Sounds like your frustration is compounded because there was no communication between you and your sister. Did you eventually talk to her & find out why she didn't show? Maybe it is time for AL or NH for Mom so you & your son can get your lives back.

What has your sister got to say for herself? My personal Step 1 would be to call her and ask, as neutrally as possible, what happened.

Though actually, I'd have done that when she didn't show. Did you try to get hold of her?

Shortstop, some people are not cut out to be caregivers, whether it's fear, embarrassment, lack of understanding. Your sister sounds like one of them. You need respite. Mom needs care.

What are mom's resources? What are her impairments? What help is she eligible for? Are there day programs she could attend? It takes time and effort to figure this stuff out. Can sister do the research, in exchange for not being asked to do hands on care?

Mom has dementia , can not b left alone. She also has colostomy bag which scares sister..she didn't show for spite on wed she said she was going to come stay weekend w mom I said good then we will take a break and she never came back

Need more info. What is moms condition? What is sis situation? Sounds like you are trying to have a life. Might want to look at in home care agency or assited living. Lots of info on this site about both. Check out disscusions on these topics.