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SewCrazy Asked November 2014

We moved Mom into a studio apt behind our home as she wished. Now, she states she's a burden to us. Any advice?

I cannot seem to make her happy and have told her we are very happy having her close. She is getting depressed since falling out of bed. Mom is 87 and does not do anything but watch TV and play games on her computer. Any ideas of how to convince her she is welcome and not a burden?

Sunnygirl1 Nov 2014
I forgot to add something I have done for seniors in my family and friend circle. I regularly pick up little items when shopping that might brighten the day of that person. It might be a little sign that says, "Always remember you are loved" or "Mom's are the best gift in life." I've gotten little soaps, a nice room freshener, a throw with flowers on it, etc. I get any small gift that might remind them how important they are to me and that I think of them often.

Sunnygirl1 Nov 2014
Sometimes medication can make a big difference in mood. I would speak to her doctor about it.

Of course, having something to do and feeling needed is also good, but I have found that when the activity is over, the person goes back to being depressed.
Still, I would try to engage her in activities at church, senior center, etc. as much as possible. I've read that untreated depression can contribute to dementia. I've seen that happen.

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Alicew234 Nov 2014
I think one of the things my mom really missed was being needed. Can you think of any regular chore she could do? My mother was ven happy sitting in someone's house waiting for a repairman...just omething to feel useful.

Unless she has severe dementia, there is some way she could help out so she doesn't feel like her life as an important and useful member of the family is over.

SewCrazy Nov 2014
I will check it out. We are new to this area. Thank you for the input!

freqflyer Nov 2014
SewCrazy, is there a senior center where you can take Mom a couple times a week so she can be around people of her own age group? That way she could develop new friendships and maybe even find some new best friends that she can talk to during the week. If she's happy she won't feel like a burden :)

BarbBrooklyn Nov 2014
How about taking her to see a geriatric psychiatrist and getting her depression treated?

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