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ohmeowzer Asked April 2014

How to handle my Mom, gets nasty and accusing?

mom has had this mean attitude on and off for awhile. yesterday i worked a 13 hour shift at the hospital , i came home exhausted, when i got home i took mom to the bathroom changed her , walked her back to the tv room made her supper , we stayed up and watched toy story 3 she loves those disney programs . i took her into her room at 10 pm helped her in bed , made sure she had her oxygen made sure she had a cold drink , and i tucked her in and fell into bed. she woke me up at 0330 and told me she was thirsty so i walked her to the tv room asked her if i could take her back to her room she said " no i'll watch tv . so i gave her a cold drink , a ensure and a yougart , said i'm going back to bed. i get up at 0730 and she is mad and nasty yelling at me " where were you ?" were you out with your friends? i said mom what friends ? i was in bed in the next room . she was just nasty calling me names , i told no more i'm done talking to her , she kept on and on , i tried to explain to her i just went to bed, she accused me of being mean and how could i be mean to my own mother. how dare i treat her like this.. she was moving out. i said where mom? my sister died in aug my only helper with her , my brother never calls or even offers help financially or anything. he says " call if you need anything?" oh brother what a crock he was very helpful the first month my sister died , he and my brother inlaw my sister's husband does help me if i ask . which i am grateful . because my brother is useless. oh everyone wants to help the first few months after a death , after that i am alone. my sister always said " it's just you and I helping mom and dad and she was right. i am alone , i have no idea how to handle mom when she gets nasty , explaining dosen't help her understand. instead i just shut up and sit there.. i just want to know how you handle your family member acting all crazy . i'm a RN and haven't a clue. ughhhhhh thank you ..

ohmeowzer Apr 2014
lol pam i need something or i'm gonna have a stroke ,,, i just told her i'm exhausted., she said thats not an excuse .. she took care of 3 kids and worked she was exhausted,,,, holy moley '

ohmeowzer Apr 2014
yeah it's coming to this you are right. i just need to start looking .. it kills me to do this to her but i have no choice i think . how do you start to get them admiited?

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pamstegma Apr 2014
This is why you move them to Assisted Living. That way the ALF staff takes the brunt of her delusions and you are the visiting angel. You also get the proper medications from her MD to stave off the depression. And if she won't take them, you do (LOL)

Chicago1954 Apr 2014
I simply could not live with my Mother. We lost the sister that was caring for her, too. I am sorry for your loss. As you know, your mom is getting to where she needs full time care, at a facility. She will be much better off, there. Your health is what is important, now - and your patients at the hospital.

Tell mom that she has to move. She really does need companionship her own age.

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