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DebbieCleary Asked December 2011

What are some things to do with my dad who is in wheelchair and can't get out to do anything? For both our sanity!

My dad has chf and can not walk or do anything without getting out of breath. For eight weeks I have just been sitting and watching movies with him, he doesn't like to play games but I think we are both getting a little stir crazy. Any ideas?

Marie123 Jan 2018
Dear Debbie,

If your father is a veteran, contact your local VA hospital. Bring a copy of his honorable discharge and get him into their Primary Based Home Care program for senior veterans. My father is similar to yours. The VA got him a motorized wheelchair, a ramp for accessibility to outside of the house and a custom stairlift to get grim first floor to second floor to access bedrooms. The program also provides a nurse aide part time and nurses who monitor his health care needs. If he is a veteran these things are free or have a small copay, he earned them through his service to his country. I am in similar situation with my dad. Good luck.

DebbieCleary Dec 2011
Thanks for the advice, I will let everyone know how things work!

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195Austin Dec 2011
My aunt with the help of a neighbor got a ramp built for free she only had to pay for the material-her neighbor found a group that does this for the elderly-check with your local hardware stores someone might be able to help with the ramp-there are caring people out there who want to help. Maybe a volunteer could come out to the house at times to help entertain him -there are also books on tapes that some people at my senior center get from the library which he might enjoy. Keep in touch you will be helping others with the same problem.

DebbieCleary Dec 2011
No I have zero help! But that is a thought thanks!

jeannegibbs Dec 2011
If this is your dad's permanent condition, might you consider a ramp to make getting him out less of a struggle? Do you have some help caring for him? Sounds like you need it!

DebbieCleary Dec 2011
I appreciate all your advice, crosswords or puzzles miGht work, he can't even wheel himself around, I have tp physically get him in and out of recliner he sleeps in and put him in his wheelchair. Or if I have to change his diaper I have to do it myself. We have stairs coming up to our house and we would have to physically lift him in his wheelchair and carry him down the steps to get him in the house. He has lost all muscle strength. That's why I am kind of stuck here at the house. But the puzzles may work ,thank you!

jeannegibbs Dec 2011
That is a toughie. Maybe there are specific games he'd enjoy. Checkers? Card games like cribbage?

What about leaving a jigsaw puzzle out on a table he can roll himself up to?

Many people like to feel useful. Folding towels or sorting socks are chores that can be done seated.

My husband has chf, too, and we find there are many exhibits that are very suitable for wheelchair use. Our local science museum offers discount memberships to persons with handicaps. They change their featured exhibit every few months. That makes a very nice outing for us. There is a nice conservatory that has been updated to be wheel-chair accessible, and it is a wonderful pick-me-up to stroll among flowers in the middle of winter. The zoo is fun. We have a large acquarium that accomodates wheelchair guests. Wandering around indoor malls, window shopping, and stopping for a snack or meal is a break from watching movies. If your dad can transfer in and out of the car, and you can get the chair in and out of the trunk or back seat, you don't have to be limited to the same four walls.

A senior center is another possibility. It is a change of scenery and a chance to visit with other people in his age range. Ours serves a hot lunch, and has someone who reads aloud a chapter a day, and also a book club for discussions of books the participants read on their own. Worth looking into, at least.

Maybe you could come up with projects to do together, to break the boredom and perhaps also get some more personal interaction going. Are there a few shoe boxes of family pictures stuck in the back of a closet? Perhaps you could sort them together, try to figure out dates, label the people, etc.

Did he have any hobbies in his healthier days that might be adaptable to being done in a wheelchair?

Could he do sudoku or crosswords? What if you did a crossword, and asked him every few minutes for help with the clues? Maybe he'd get drawn into it inspite of himself.

I'd love to have a few days to indulge myself in nonstop movie viewing. But I'm sure I would be stir crazy long before 8 weeks! You are wise to be looking for a variety of other things to do. Since lots of caregivers are in your spot, I hope you'll report back on any things you try that work well.

Ruth1957 Dec 2011
Going through books with lots of pictures and only a small amout of text is something my client enjoys. Doesn't take a huge amount of concentration but is enjoyable. Sorting photos might be good. I cared for an elderly gentleman who worked on Boeing aircraft in his younger days. I found a book about the history of the Boeing 747 and he loved it. Making a scrap book or looking at cards you've received would be enjoyable. If he likes to cook, there are things he can form like no-bake cookies, cheese bites, etc.

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