Last week I met with a man I met online 5 years ago, shortly after he was diagnosed with the beginnings of Lewy Body Dementia (which my husband also had), as Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI). He lives on the other side of the country, but I've met with him and his wife several times when he has been nearby for medical consultation.
It has been a rocky road for him and his wife. A current conflict we talked about was that if she does something and he doesn't like it or it is disturbing to him, etc. he'll tell her to stop and then she wants to explain what she was trying to do. I suppose she feels defensive, or wants to assure him she was trying to act in his best interests. But he doesn't want to hear the explanations. He takes for granted that she is trying to do the right thing. She doesn't need to defend herself. She just needs to stop -- no explanations or apologies needed.
He talked about how overwhelming it feels to him to be getting too much data coming at him, too much stimulation. He needs it shut down and simplified.
I thought that a very interesting observation. Does it ring bells with anyone? Does your loved one with dementia ever get more agitated when you are simply trying to explain why something happened? How do you handle that?
(BTW, I was late in meeting with this couple. As I parked the car I thought of all the reasons for the delay. Some of them might have made mildly amusing small talk. I decided not to explain -- I didn't drive an hour and a half to discuss such trivia. I'd apologize and then get on with what we were together for. Holy Cow! I'm sure glad I made that decision after hearing him on the subject of too much information!)