Dad had his first fall in MC last night, trip to ER.. going downhill fast.

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We took my dad to MC a week and a half ago, he had a horrible downturn and we were all not able to take our eyes off him for a minute.. he was falling, up all night.. you know the drill. The first week he had to stay in AL due to a GI outbreak, with a companion at all times. This week they were able to move him up to MC. ( He was on a month long respite trial). I really like it there, he is at least with other people with less stress.. and they were very good with his odd hours, etc.. Last night at 11 the phone rang.. he fell, no obvious damage but he hit his head, so they had to take him to the ER. Back by 430 am, all fine
I just can not believe how fast he has gone downhill. He is not swallowing his food, can barely walk. Today we sighned him in as a permanent resident.. so very hard for all of us but Mom the most. At least this way we can get him a swallowing eval, correct food, etc. I love this place. but it is still hard. They can take him all the way to the end (hospice) and we don't see this lasting very long. I thought I was ready.. but this is hard and trying to be calm for Mom is harder!
Thank you all for all your support in the past, and I know you will be a good support in the future.

15 Comments

I am so sorry pamz.... my heart and prayers go out to you. We seem to be in sort of the same place lately. He did have a UTI right? They treated him for it? No improvements?

The falling is my worst fear, although mom has fell 2 pretty serious times, there were no broken bones, just a few stiches. (((hugs))) honey... (((hugs))) to your mother as well.
nope, No UTI, no stroke.. just a complete downturn. In one week. I know he would not want to be this way, and he is in a good place.. but... Hubs just went to go see mom ( she is watching TV in rec room) and she was crying.. he gave her some space. She was crying in MC while I sighned the papers.. they are so sweet, told her she could spend a night or two if she wanted to. I;m trying to be strong...
Pam don't keep all your sad feelings to yourself. Of course it is hard for Mom but for the two of you to have a good cry together may be very reassuring for her. It will tell her you really share her feelings. Yes you have to be the strong one when it comes to practical things because Mom is in too much of an emotional mess to deal with stuff on her own but let her comfort you as you comfort her. She is still the Mom. Be careful with investigating too much ie with the swallowing evaluation. He probably wont be able to co-operate with the test anyway. Now may be the time to just switch him to a liguid diet. Be guided by the staff. If he is loosing the ability to walk he is clearly deteriorating very rapidly so make the decision to go to comfort care and let him be the guide about what he wants and is able to do. This will probably not be his last fall so decide if you want him dragged to the ER each time. What kind of treatment would you want him to have. Prolonging life is not always the kindest thing to do even for someone who is greatly loved. Prayers for you and Mom and Dad.
He is not even swallowing liquids very well now. We just want the eval to see if it will help at all, and today they got it all set up. Going to try soft mechanical with formal eval tomorrow ( not a swallow study). I think comfort care is rapidly approaching, and neither Mom nor I want to prolong things.. but we want to feel like we tried every comfort approach. Found out they only took him to ER because he hit his head a bit (some rug rash).. it;s thier policy. No ER for a "regular " fall. I had mom listen in to the RN and dietary staff.. the PT folks will call her tomorrow with thier recommendations. (I work the next 3 days, but hubs will be here with her except for tomorrow) Told my daughter she should get in for a visit while she can..
The PT is for his swallow.. guess it's really speech/OT...
Pam the speach therapist does the swallow evaluation. It is usually done under fleuroscopy and patient is asked to eat different textures of food. If he can't swallow there seems little point but it wont do any harm and he just sits there in his W/C so no stress.
I'm so sorry pamzimmrrt. You and your family will be in my prayers.
No fleuro Veronia91, just a lower key eval at this point, we agree no real point in extensive testing as we know where this is headed.. just want to do anything non invasive we can. We can't even usually get him to open his mouth at this point ( teeth are awful at this point.. sometimes they can brush the front..) No IV's either,, so ....
Pamz, do you you have a MOLST form on file? Mom here is not quite ready for hospice, so the hospice nurse advised a signed DNR with no transport to ER except for extreme pain. She gave us the MOLST (medical orders for life sustaining treatment) form because mom herself does not want further interventions.
Yes Pams,, that and the POA were done years ago, my mom was in heathcare ( as I am) and they were very proactive. Also had to do an updated one for MC. Only treatments are to be for comfort. The ER trip for head strike during fall is MC requirement.. they would not have done anything for a bleed or whatever without our approval. I assume it is a state requirement or for lawsuit avoidance in case someone wanted to sue. (we would not, falls are part and parcil of this disease,, and he was just too fast for them) We just want him comfortable,, hospice is probably coming very fast, and this MC can provide that option. PArt of why we chose them.

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