Call his doctor and have him assessed for needing LTC. Then you get him into a facility that accepts Medicaid on private pay. Look for facilities that have a LTC and hospice services on the premises. Then you apply for Medicaid and assuming he qualifies, his medical will be 100% covered by Medicaid and his room and board will be paid for 100% by his SS income. Medicaid will not impoverish the spouse so don't hesitate to apply. The app is not that complicated but you will need at least the most recent last 3 months of his banking info, his SSN, DOB, his unpaid medical bills, any info about any assets beyond 1 car and a house (which are allowed). Medicaid does not "take" people's physical homes/property so don't fear this. Then, when he is ill enough he can go into hospice care which is covered by Medicare. Look for faith-based facilities because IMO they are more affordable and provide higher quality care. I hope this info helps. I wish you success in getting him appropriate care and rest for yourself. Please make sure you have a PoA assigned who is a generation younger than you, lives locally, is willing, is trustworthy and is competent. This will give you protection and peace of mind.
Mamabear, this sounds like overwhelming caregiving even for a person half your age. Hope you can get a more sustainable situation going. Thinking of you. 😊
You don't ask a question, but I will say that if your husbands care is getting to be too much for you, then it's time to speak to a elder law attorney to get your finances figured out so you can get your husband placed in the appropriate facility, where he will be taken care of 24/7 and you can get back to just being his loving wife and advocate and not his overwhelmed and burned out caregiver.
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