Is it wrong for me to pre-arrange mom’s funeral without my siblings input?
My siblings are non-exsistent in moms life and have been for a while. My brother used to help with mom sometimes before I came into the picture 2years ago. But his help was based on monetary gain from mom.He sucked her for almost what she was worth. My sister actually disassociated herself from mom 5years ago. She(sister) only came around once in a while to "visit" me never speaking more than a word or two to our mother. But crap hit the fan with us over a year ago and there hasn't been any contact from neither. I know they have heard through grapevine when mom was not well.Even now with mom on Hospice and I know her time is running out....NOTHING from them. We live in a small community so I know by now they know of moms worsening condition. My sister lives about 1-2miles away, and my brother is MIA, don't know where he is?? But I am sure not far, maybe at the nearest crack house. My sister has an adult son and an older teenager and there is no contact from them either. Years ago the only way I could get them grandkids here to see mom was to give them a few bucks. To me thats a bunch of crap.
When my father died about 6 years ago my sister being much older than me and brother ran the show talking mom into high-price everything. Which was above dads ins. policy amount. My sister was handed many cards at funeral with money donations for "our" famliy. But mom never seen a dime. My sister bragged to me that she made upwards of $600 off of it. When meanwhile, mom had to dish out the extra money that dads funeral costed, when that money should have went to our mother.
So I recently went and made pre-arrangements for mom. I did it on my own. I chose things mom would want even thought not my taste.But its moms wishes not mine.
Honestly, if it was up to me I'd rather them not attending the funeral when the time comes. I decided along with my husband that when mom leaves this earth, they can hear about it through the "grapevine" cause I am not contacting them directly.
Is this wrong of me to feel this way???
If they don't care that she is alive then why should they care when she is gone!!!
I thought I put aside this anger toward my worthless sibling. But now with mom slowly slipping away the angry is building again. My husband and I with our kids ARE moms family. And we will be the ones here to witness the end of her life fighting right beside her.