A relative has Alzheimer's, and is in a nice AL at present, though will soon require more care than AL. I'm far away and try to phone her every week or so. Other family members visit regularly, take her out, manage things, hold her POA, etc., so she is safe, which is a blessing. It's getting difficult to motivate myself to call because she constantly complains and recounts old grudges and grievances (real and imagined), questions everything, won't accept that she cannot handle her own money, repeats the same things over and over, and so on. The move to AL was sudden and traumatic for her. It was precipitated by a bad fall (she was living alone), after her children had been trying to years to get her to plan for this kind of thing. But she wouldn't, even when it was clear to everyone else she was in cognitive decline. Her children had to handle the transition including clearing out the house, selling her car and so on. I also hear all her notions about things that "would help her get her memory back" (even though they WON'T). She is always asking for things like old photos, documents, and calendars - some that just don't exist any more (some never did), though family members bring what they can. I try to divert the conversations to happier things, but she always goes back to the same old, same old. Any advice? Or do I just pour myself a stiff drink, and just listen to her rant next time I call? She used to be quite independent, so the transition has been especially difficult for her and her family.