My mom saw him briefly and they told her they were moving him to a room for the night and he would be going home tomorrow after lunch. At 8:00pm she called and said no one had called her and she was worried because when she called the hospital they put her on hold and when they finally came back she said they were moving him to extended stay. Won't tell her why. She called again and they said they had no patient by that name. When I heard this I called and couldn't get through so I called the emergency room and they told me he was still in surgery. I was at the hospital at 10:00 am when they said we could see him at 2:00. I had to leave but mom stayed. So then I called the general admittance number and after a very long wait I'm talking up to a half hour on the four or five calls I made with an inquirery for transfer to extended stay and finally after almost threatening her I said ALMOST I was finally transfered to extended stay where I spoke briefly with a nurse that said he had JUST gotten there. Now it's like 9:00 at night, almost 12 full hours since he got OUT of surgery which by the way they finished a half hour early from their original timeline which I though was weird. She said she would have my father get in touch with my mother shortly. He didn't seem to know why he was there. We still do not know where he was in the meantime. We got all this conflicting information. My dad said they were sending in another doctor to see him the next day he didn't know why and to date not one doctor, nurse social workier or anyone has called us. My dad was still extremely active and coherent right up to the day of his surgery. Is it normal practice for doctors to let loved ones sit home and get worried sick? My father is very much loved and has no querey about his WIFE that he still lives with and very much loves knowing whats going on. HE doesn't know what's going on. We can't seem to get any answers and neither of us can drive at night. SO What do I do? >:

Find Care & Housing
This all depends on what type of surgery. My DH had same day to shrink his prostrate. Went in at 10:30am was out of recovery by 2pm. My concern would be why was he going from an overnight to a stay? I really feel the surgeon should have called Mom or someone in his office. She should also ask, why another doctor when he was suppose to be released the next day.

I agree, if you are not listed on the HIPPA form as someone Dad has listed they can give info to, then they won't say more than "he is comfortable".

Same with Mom, unless she has POA, Dad has to list her too. They have no idea who is on the phone.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to JoAnn29
worriedinCali May 25, 2019
Some hospitals won’t talk to you unless you have a special code. The hospital my husband just had surgery at, they will not give you any information if you don’t have a numeral code that they give the patient when they register/check in/are admitted. So even if you are on the “list”, without that code, you won’t get any information over the phone. My husband doesn’t think and took the paper with the code on it with him when he went in to the hospital for surgery. It’s a good thing I didn’t need to call the hospital for information about him!
pinacarlada, I fully understand your and your Mom's concern about getting information. Did your Dad's surgeon explain prior to surgery what were the steps involved? Where you and Mom could sit and wait so that the surgeon can come out to give you status? How long Dad would be in recovery? And what steps would be taken after that.... such has he could go home within a 23 hour time span or that he would be staying over-night for observation? Sometimes we tend to become deer-in-headlights and miss hearing this information.

Usually a hospital has an information desk which is open during the day. One can find out from the Staff or volunteers [I work this desk as a volunteer] what are the best in-house phone numbers to call.

And it is not unusual to call a hospital and get zero information if your name isn't on the HIPAA form. Chances are only your Mom was listed on the form, and with stress she could easily not understand everything that was going on. And, of course, your Dad would be in a fog after surgery, that is very normal. For every hour of being under, it usually takes 1 month for every hour to get rid of that brain fog.

Hopefully everything is back on track today regarding communication. And your Dad will be coming home soon, if not today. Tell your Mom that her hubby will be dazed for a few weeks, and that it is normal. I remember after my Dad had a surgery, the next day he wanted to get out of the hospital bed to go downstairs to pay his hotel bill.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to freqflyer

What you do is try to get some sleep. Nothing is going to change tonight. Hes safe, and you can’t drive at night. Plan to be there 1st thing in the morning. There may be multiple reasons he couldn’t go home as planned, that they need to get under control for a day, like blood pressure, or bowel movement. I know it’s tough to try to get answers from a hospital after regular hours over the phone. I ended up parking myself in Moms room every day until about 9 pm after her surgery. It was a learning experience. I hope you all make out better today.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to rocketjcat

I am sorry you had to go through this. My husband is due to have prostate surgery in a couple of months. When he was recently hospitalized for the biopsy of the prostrate as well as recent unrelated knee surgery my phone was given as the main and really in our case only one of anyone that is local. I received calls updating me. Generally if a phone number of a main contact is given that person will be called. Perhaps if your mother was called she may have been confused. I hope this might be it for now for your father but I would strongly suggest you leave your phone number as the contact in the future.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Riverdale

Your father had surgery and they said they were going to keep him overnight.

He was in the recovery room for several hours, which is standard procedure.

You called the ER, which is not where he was.

You called admissions. He was not being admitted; he was in observation status most likely.

This is what hospitals are like. And most patients are fairly confused after anesthesia. At least mine is.

Next time, before leaving the hospital, you need to secure the contact number for where dad is being moved to. Hospitals do not give out patient info over the phone.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to BarbBrooklyn

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter