My friend is 89 and hasn't been to a Dr. in many, many years. She doesn't even have a primary care Dr. Takes no medications whatsoever.

Her memory is failing, she is often confused and has started to show signs of paranoia. a couple of times she has said things that suggest she is delusional at times. Her son lives with her but he works full time and she is alone all day. Even getting her to accept Meals on Wheels was a challenge. She had stopped eating, she couldn't even remember that food had been prepared and left for her in the fridge. Meals on Wheels has been very good though. She is now eating. We want to make an appt. with a Dr and take her kicking and screaming but we lack her medicare insurance information and without that we can't even get the appt. nobody has power of attorney over her.

Any suggestions?

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Thank you for your answer. I should have said that the son is very concerned, involved and caring for her as much as he can. I'm helping him deal with her because she is much more open to hearing suggestions from me than from him, but she becomes very stubborn about not seeing a Dr. and very secretive about her finances and her personal information. He called his local hospital's Senior Services center to start the evaluation process. Ironically, she used to be a nurse there, but without the medicare information they wouldn't even give her an appointment. It appears that she has been switching her coverage from one provider to another and she won't disclose the information to him or to me. I will suggest to him that he at least try to find her SSN and we can go from there.

Thank you very much.
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GGR - Before I say anything, I must caution you: if her son lives with her and is not attempting to tend to these things, he could be charged with elder abuse. To find out what's possible in your state, contact your local area agency on aging to see what they recommend.

It could mean that the son has to call 911 to tell them she fell down and that he wants her evaluated at a hospital. once there, he'll need to talk with social services at the hospital in GREAT detail. He must tell them he knows nothing about her medical insurance and provide her social security (and perhaps his fathers SS# if he was the major bread winner) number to them. They should be able to determine what medicare coverage she has. Any US citizen age 62 or 65 + ( can't remember the exact age) automatically qualifies for medicare so she'll have some coverage no matter what.

If the son is not willing to do these things - then you need to call the Area Agency on Aging to report possible elder abuse. He could be in denial or just clueless but NOT providing assistance is as bad as neglecting KNOWN conditions - sometimes WORSE.

Your friend is lucky to have you!
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