How do I get my 96 year old dad into our car by myself in order to get him out and about?

I do not know the answer to your question but I admire your willingness to tackle such a problem. I’ve never even heard of most of the things you’ve already tried.
If it were me I would contact his doctor and ask for an order for physical therapy. The therapist really helped me understand how to help my parents getting in and out of a ca. Neither had the challenges your dad deals with though my mom did have a fractured back once and we did manage.
You’ve inspired me to take my aunt out more.
I hope someone has some great tips for you.

You have the spirit & confidence to try new ways - impressive. He is very lucky to have you as his carer!

Can you get a home PT or OT visit? This was arranged for one relative when I was having trouble & it really helped. Worked out what was still possible.

I must admit, since then, I have given up transporting two relatives in my car as they need more than I can do.

Now it's a 'walk' outside in a wheelchair or wheelchair taxi.

I did get some PT/OT for someone with part of the reason being that they could work on getting elder in/out of a car. PT came out and did assessment. While they were there, I inquired about the car thing and how to get elder in/out. PT was flabbergasted that I'd asked something like that and her response was "You have NO idea how complex it is to actually teach someone getting in/out of a car safely." I guess she was right - I had no idea. PT did work with elder on basic tasks and strengthening, but never got anywhere near the complexity of getting in/out of a car because elder did not make progress on the simpler things, so she was unable to progress to the difficult things. Of course, part of the reason she did not make progress was that elder would not practice her exercises in between visits and then she cried a river about wanting more therapy so she could travel by car. Also believed she would have been fine in a car even without therapy if we would only let her "try" to get in the car. She also felt she could likely drive (haha), but we didn't let her attempt that either. Just know that therapy visits don't go on indefinitely, so unfortunately therapists do have to make rather quick decisions regarding what skills to work on and what things might not be possible anymore. Some people accomplish a lot with PT/OT, but others don't get as much out of it.

Some states have dial a ride for the elderly where the caregiver can go along with the clients maybe check with his insurance company sometimes they have a program or volunteers that will help with transportation. If your father is military Veteran they will pay for a lift for newer model vehicles you could check with VA or VFW.

I would hire a wheelchair accessible taxi for your outings.

The risk of you or Dad getting hurt is far to great to get him into your car.

I’d work on ways to get him fresh air on the porch or near window. There are some virtual tours online of some great places and gardens. Taking someone with such limited mobility out in a car without help is very risky. What if you break down or have an accident? Plus there’s covid. If possible, you could get a ramp, wheelchair and wheelchair accessible van that will lift him in and he stays in the wheelchair. That’s what I did with my LO when she had to leave house to get to doctor.

if you are not using a gait belt to transfer him to anything, you might want to get one. It is a wide web belt that gives you something to hold on to. It makes transferring patients easier. If he is able to bear weight and pivot, he should be able to get into car. Sounds like he is past that. If he cannot support his own weight long enough to stand up, and pivot, then sit his butt down on the car seat, there is no way you can safely do it yourself. Car rides for fun are going to be off the table. There is just no way to do it. I am a nurse and I do know how to transfer people. My FIL was 130 lbs and also wheelchair bound due to severe weakness in legs from spine problem. Once he could no longer stand, I stopped taking him in the car. He was in a facility by then so we could use facility doctor which helped. The staff could have helped me put him in the car, but there would be no way to get him out.

as already said, check with senior services in your township. Look at handicapped rides services. A medicar costs at least $100 each way so not a good idea for the doctors office trips. Maybe now, telemedicine is a good idea. Taking him anywhere is risky.
as the weather gets nice, can you get him outside in his chair? At his age, he will be vulnerable to Covid so he really can’t see other people anyway. Your sentiments are admirable but he really is no longer mobile and should not be going anywhere.

Twatson...I saw in a reply to a post that your dad is a Veteran. You might check with the VA if he is going to the VA for appointments or the CBOC some provide transportation. And if it is real difficult to get him out there is a program where the Doctors and Nurses come to the home. Ask about that. Will not work for specialists though.

I used a contractor garbage bag with the bottom cut to easily move my husband in the car. He would sit on the edge of the seat and I would swing his legs into the car and the bag would slide on itself (very much like using a draw sheet) and it would be easy to position him. (my Husband was 6'4 and over 200 pounds and I could slide him using the heavy duty garbage bag)

But, and this is important...SAFETY if it is no longer safe for you to try to get him in and out of a car or if it is no longer safe for him to try to get in and out of a car than the rides need to stop.
Get a medical transport.
Most Public Transportation services also have Handicap vans or small buses that will pick up passengers and take them to whatever destination and they will return to take you home.. Some require 24 hour notice.

I would get a second opinion on the PT. I had it done several times. From my own experience, getting into a car that is lower to the ground is much harder. We have had much success with a Honda Van and also some smaller SUV’s. When we reached the point that my mom was no longer enjoying going on car outings, we started our search for a doctor that only treated the home-bound. Talked to visiting nurses for some references, their advice was invaluable. Good luck in the rest of your journey with your Dad 💞🙏. Enjoy every minute you can.

I’m in the same boat. Just getting down twoinside steps and to the car is a day’s work and feels dangerous! Hope you get responses!

I had a friend who was too heavy and too weak to get in a car. She bought a modified mini van, with a built in ramp that deployed hydraulically. I would then roll her wheelchair into the van and lock it into place. Of course someone would have to accompany her and drive. But she was able to enjoy getting out.

We are working on this issue right now. Checked into BraunAbility Turny EVO mechanical passenger seat that swivels and moves outside the car. Very cool but super expensive ($8-9,000) installed and only available for SUV, van/truck, not a low profile vehicle. We wanted to try a basic swivel seat, inexpensive, widely available, but gets very mixed reviews and it is nearly impossible to find one that fits a car bucket seat, all too wide at 15+ inches. We are currently checking into a boat swivel seat mechanism (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001O0DE8A/?coliid=I164I20G1MXM83&colid=1XBSJFDFWDHTK&psc=1&ref_=lv_ov_lig_dp_it_im) that can "hug" the car seat. We will make a padded seat to bolt into the top and the next concern will be seat height. Stay tuned! Or, if someone else gets to a solution like this first, please do let us know. Good luck all. We really appreciate this forum.

$9000 for a swivel seat? Must do a lot more than I can picture.

Call me a cheapskate, but a plastic bag on the seat works for me 😁.

Car transfers can be really difficult. My Aunt took care of her husband who was a quadriplegic and it took a huge toll on her back and knees after years of manually transferring him in and out of the car so please make sure to take care of yourself too. We were looking for a lift to help with my mom and found out there are many different types....have you come across these options?
Hope you find a good solution.

https://www.takealonglifts.com/

http://www.blvd.com/vehicle-mobility-transfer-seats/milford-person-lift

http://accessunlimited.com/html/multi-lift-car.html

Is moving him in and out of a car that important to you? Is it safe anymore for you or him? My mom is 94 and what we have the go through just to get her out of the house safely is just not feasible anymore. She is on hospice, so I don’t take her to anymore doctor appts. This is a God-send to me. She could easily have fallen by now and broke a hip or whatever just trying to get her here and there.

Hi Just be really careful. Since their skin is so thin, I was transferring my mom and her leg got sliced and took over a year to heal, with home health care.

My 90 yr Dad was basically chair bound due to a broken foot.

We (I, cuz I was the only person willing to do it) were able to get my Dad, in & our of my car, with a slide board. He's roughly (well, he was. Passed away recently) alittle over 200lb's.

#1. He has to be willing & wanting to get out. Otherwise, you won't get any cooperation from him.

#2. Coach him, every step of the way. Easier with 2 people but can be done with one. I'm a female & if I can do it, anyone can. When he was able, I'd have him, reach for the steering wheel & pull himself in.

No easy task but can be done. Hope this helps

I lucked out. My husband had bought a Chevy Aveo for a commuter car. It happened that the seat height was just about perfect for my grandfather to stand and pivot to sit. And the handholds were pretty well placed too. Also the area to swing his legs in were really spacious. A minivan with a wheelchair ramp would be ideal. But if you can't find one, then trading your vehicle for something with better ergonomics might make you both happier.

Dr Jack Grenan trying to help you! You are blessed to have your father alive and he is blessed to have you. First congratulations how is his speech & mental ability. It Depends on what is causing the problem with the car. It may be that it is time for a wheel chair with a car! The best thing for you to do is get a referral to a physical therapist and see what he/she thinks. Message me if I can be of any help. I am NOT seeking clients & money I am a survivor of 4th stage colon cancer and a 4 month coma and I died went to Heaven & came back! Crazy but blessed & true!
Love and Peace

I would not do it alone. Accessible van or car lift chair better options. I hired accessible van service when my mothers legs were extremely weak. We were allowed to accompany my mom to her appointments. I do range of motion exercises most days.. She also walks short distance with two caregivers. This helps my mothers leg strengths tremendously. I notice a big difference when we skip a few days. We had physical therapy in for 6 weeks which was helpful. There was not much advice getting her in and out of the van, but accessible would be best in her opinion. Very expensive, but more practical and safe. Hope you find a solution soon.

I have found some front seat devices that will swivel and extend out of the vehicle to allow transition from a chair to a car seat.
One was called a turney. I have no information on the cost. Don't confuse this to the seat for the driver which will do similar functions.
The one I am talking about is for the passenger side.
Good luck.

If y’all have family and friends that live close by, having him sit outside while they drive by to wave and wish him well might be fun. Maybe one car could circle back, sit outside in the shade, 6 feet away, and visit for a few minutes.

On the the other hand, you might spring for a wheelchair accessible taxi to drive him by family and friends’ homes, letting them know ahead of time that he’ll be driving by, and they could come to the curb and each tell him a knock knock joke. Maybe drive by as his church is dismissing, (if they are meeting in person now) letting the congregation know he’s coming through the parking lot and the groups can wave and wish him well.

You are a sweet daughter to try and find ways to bring your father joy. God bless you.

Try putting him in the back seat of the car. That worked for me. Move the seat on the passenger in front up as far as it can go. This way it gives him more room and it also helps when you try to get him out of the car. It makes it easier for you to work his legs for him as he gets out. Good luck Peggy

Does your father WANT to go out in the car? That's the question. After my father developed mobility issues, he did not want to ride in the car anymore as he was frightened of me and my DH getting him in and out of it, even though the physical therapist had helped us develop a good technique.

If the answer is 'yes', that he does want to go out in the car, then get a physical therapist involved by coming into your home and showing you precisely how to do it safely.

If the answer is 'no', that he does not want to go out in the car, then leave him alone & honor his wishes, as I did with my father.

Good luck!

Have you thought about contacting a physical therapist regarding teaching you and your Dad safe car transfers? They may be able to show you techniques as well as possible equipment. An occupational therapist may be of value too. A physician's order may be needed in order for insurance reimbursement. Or another option is using a wheelchair van service which can be costly. I am a little worried about both of your safety in all of this. I also am concerned about injury to the two of you. Please be careful.

Ask doctor for a physical therapy consult. The therapist can assess your dad's mobility and your situation. They can recommend devices that work and train you in their use. If you dad can not do any weight-bearing, it will be much harder to get him into and out of vehicles, but PT should be able to help you find a way.

He's probably "comfortable" staying home, now. If he knows how to use a computer, there are online sites he could go to for social needs. Just a quick search came up with a website called, myboomerplace.

Imho, youi'd do yourself a favor by asking his physician. And if it's too hard on you to take him out, do not do it.

I have read many questions in “aging care.com“ and there has been so much complaining, bitterness and anger. Sadly, responses have often fed into the negativity instead of lifting the person up.
This is the sweetest post I have seen. You cannot be much younger than your father and here you are sacrificing to bring some joy in his life.
The responses have been encouraging with practical suggestions, and the doctor on here who died and went to heaven... no longer in practice but very knowledgeable... he is here to serve.
What an encouraging post.
The best to you.
I don’t have much to offer except this thought...
if you contact a physical therapist make sure you ask how to protect or build up your own body to continue to be a companion to your father.

Unsure of your finances, but they make a car seat that comes out of the car and to a lower position to let him transfer. Then rotates to move back into the car in the passenger position for driving. Here is a link to an example: http://www.blvd.com/vehicle-mobility-transfer-seats