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Since you have the Medical POA, that could weigh in your favor. The person trusted you enough to do that. But still, I like to error on the side of safety if possible.
Question #2: I did my own will, power of attorney for personnal care and power of attorney for property and finance, all three documents are signed by myself and two witnesses...do I really need a lawyer to sign off as well? Seems like a money grap scam to me.
You can find the forms to do POAs all around the net. I actually pulled the paragraph above right off the quick fill-in-the-blanks form for the durable poa. The most important part is to make sure you can get 2 witnesses, the person you will be standing up as attorney-in-fact as and a notary public all together at the same time. I was able to get one to come out to my grandmother's house on the day of signing ... he only charged $10 to notarize 2 docs. The clerk in your probate court should be able to guide you to finding a notary close to where you are.
I probably don't need to tell you how important and serious a power of attorney document is; you basically become the other person.
Best of luck to you in this really difficult time. The ability to keep my sensibilities about me and try to see the business things that MUST be done in spite of how I was feeling emotionally is something I will always be greatful for discovering about myself.
notary log book this was not sufficient proof of their identification and therefore the DPO a was rejected so now I am back to square one.
My father and mother are cared for by my sister, who also,is in poor health, having had two heart attacks, and four stints, pancreatis and other health issues. My parents can not be left alone and need 24/7 care. Dad is also incontinent and white the total body atrophy, his muscles do not work so moving him From the hospital bed into a wheel chair is like moving dead weight. The three of them live solely on my parents soc. sec., and live day to day, hand to mouth. Still, they do not qualify for Medicaid... There is no money form home care, respite care, or any other senior free aid. I am trying to get free legal aid to get a DPOA thru CLMSF but that is a long shot.
My sister does a great job taking care of mom and dad. It is frustrating for her as many days even mom can not physically and mentally help sis even move or change, bathe and dress dad. Getting him out of bed, changed, dressed and fed just to get to a DR appt is a 3 hr process, and that is when mom can assist.
I live in MA and try to research and track down assistance for them, I also make trips to Fla to,give sis a break, but that is only temporary and can not be frequent enough.
Every place we turn to for assistance either costs money they simply do not have, or they are making too much money...seriously....three people live on $2,300.er month. From this comes expenses of approx $2,100. Per month for basic living expenses like rent, food, medicine, medical insurance and utilities.
I have stacks of paperwork, names and numbers of organizations that are supposed to assist my parents and sister. Not a single one has been helpful.
I would like for my sister tone able to even take time out for herself to see a movie, or even have to e for personal care. There is none. She is constantly on duty, 24/7...literally. Dad constantly sundowns and calls out all night long...meds barely help. Between making sure they have their meds, meals, and she makes sure they are nutritional meals, bathing dad, dressing dad, trying to get hi to exercise his muscles, (which are failing him),cleaning hse....when ever it is possible , and getting mom to eat...there is no time to even go to the bathroom without being on alert.
I was there in October for two weeks. While there, my sister had another heart attack and was I the hospital. Shortly after that and after I returned home, dad was I the hospital for two weeks due decline in health and memory, was in a rehab for only a week because Humana would not pay for longer stay and my parents could not afford the $50. Per day charge for him to remain. So, she and mom are it, except for when I can get there. I was there In feb and again in may. Dad is currently suffering from a severe uti and dehydration, he refuses to drink water because he is in depends and doesn't want to pee I. Them, although he can not always communicate when he needs to go. He has also had bowel incontinence for. To e to time. He has had bladder cancer and has a neo bladder which contributes to the incontinence, he also has had a couple of bouts with cancer and a stoke.
Sorry for rambling, but I can not comprehend why in this country, American citizens who were born, raised and supported this country their entire lives have to be subjected to such degradation in old age. My parents are only 18 years older than me so I can see what is I store for me.
Mom spends many days saying she just wants it to be over....dad can't say too much of anything at times, sis is ready for a nervous breakdown...or a other heart attack, which ever happens first and I too even though far away have many sleepless nights and anxiety attacks over all of this.
Sis has no,health insurance, not eligible for SSD, can not leave parents to go to work. She therefore does not even have her much needed heart and blood pressure medicines for herself.
Mom.s glasses are so old I don't think she ca see with them anymore, and her teeth are breaking off I her mouth so,she only has front teeth to chew/eat with so she doesn't want to eat. These things are not even covered with Humana , and they can not afford to get on policy. I can not find free dental for mom and here has been no help for lions club for glasses.
This is such a depressing state of affairs, why would anyone want to grow old and live this way in America is beyond me. I think I would prefer other alternatives than to have to live like this in the future.
Sorry for rambling, I am just so frustrated and depressed by it all and by the lack of assistance, real available assistance for seniors and my parents and younger sister.
To WZATMATH: Go to an attorney and have them draw up a Durable Power of Attorney for you, do not do it on your own. Laws change from time to time and each state is different to some degree, so to be safe with such a serious matter, have it done by a professional, don't mess around and be sorry later. I say this from experience.
To Lindipan: Do not trust the Bank of America as far as you can throw them!! Here to I speak from experience. I paid thousands of dollars to have my parents Trust updated and I was given POA over Mom's Healthcare and Financial matters and had all documentation to prove it. My parents have banked at Bank of America for over 50 years and I took my documentation to them not to remove any money from the bank to to open another account in the name of the Trust and move some money sitting in a checking account that was outside the trust back into the Trust and they refused to accept my POA. I went round and round with a newbie in the Legal Department and the truth is THE BANK OF AMERICA CHOOSES NOT TO ACCEPT ANYONE'S POA UNLESS THEY ARE SUED IN A COURT AND FORCED TO DO SO! This is the absolute truth and I am not just saying it out of anger. There are attorneys you can go to who will sue them for you and the funny thing is the Bank of America has to foot the bill for their illegal practices. Your other option is to find another bank and take your documentation to them and open your accounts there. I went to One West Bank and they opened the accounts I needed with my POA.
I was livid after this happened to me and I was yelling at my attorney that he had given me documentation that was not worth the paper it was written on and then I found out from several people that the Bank of America does this ALL THE TIME!
They know that most people will simply seek another bank and will not go to the trouble of suing them. See you cannot sue them for damages, you can only sue to force them to accept your documentation. If they could be sued for 1 million dollars for every single person they have denied, they would end their practice of denial. What they do is illegal! They have put you through HELL and you are trying to do this and living in another state, but do they care? NO THEY DON'T!
To Ladoucec: Now that your parent already has Alzheimer's/Dementia you can no longer obtain a POA. That must be obtained PRIOR to the parent becoming ill. I is set up with the understanding that it only comes into use when that parent is no longer able to care for themselves or makes decisions for themselves. Now your only option is to become their conservator, which is a lot of work and costly. I would say call an attorney and ask for a consultation many offer an hour for free. I would NEVER attempt to do my own Trust or POA, everything must not just be signed but signed in front of a notary.
Also an attorney will not make up a Trust or POA for you AFTER your parent is ill with any mental illness like Alzheimer's or Dementia. It is illegal and unethical and they can be held responsible if a person is trying to rip off another sibling by doing this. FYI
My mother did not see the real need to give me her POA but because I cared for her and handled all her financial matters and healthcare she spoke to the attorney alone, and decided to give it to me prior to her memory becoming a problem. This is a very hard discussion to have with a parent but if you don't do it early enough you will suffer big time with this later on and your parents could lose everything.
As Debralee advises, get an attorney. When my sister was dying, I discussed with her what she wanted, called my attorney, and in a day or two she came to the hospital and all the documents were executed.
She was a notary herself, we brought two acquaintances of my father for witnesses.
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